4

4 Amma is crouched against the wall at the far end of the Ladies corridor at the National, toilet doors lining either side, keeping a lookout while Dominique expertly cuts several lines of coke on her travel mirror

it feels like the old days when they'd sit and have a wazz in full view of each other while continuing whatever conversation they were stuck into no matter how long since they've last seen each other, the distance of three thousand miles across America, plus another four thousand across an ocean, dissolves as if it was never a barrier in the first place they pick up as comfortably as the time before, this is the real meaning of a friendship that lasts a lifetime Dominique passes the mirror carefully over to Amma, here, ruin the lining of your nose with this Amma snorts two lines up a nostril, as it hits the spot, she closes her eyes to savour the moment, feeling it infuse her bloodstream with heavenly sensations remember this used to be the first night ritual for our plays? Dominique says, as she suctions up the rest of the powder as the drug takes effect, she feels her own surge of euphoria as jet-lag is replaced with effervescent currents how could I forget? Amma replies, recollecting their shared past is often a rhetorical ritual, good of you to resurrect such a fine old theatrical tradition, Dominique, talking of which, you really did like the play and production? I mean you really liked it? Dominique has already said she loved it multiple times, but not enough for Amma, who craves reassurance it was sick, Amma, sick, you threw up all over the grand old knights of the theatre who'll be raging in their graves, my girl you liked it then? Dominique showed up unannounced at the stage door to surprise her, whacked down to the bone, after ten sleepless hours from LA overnight, then an Uber from Heathrow to the National to take her seat just before the lights went down for an unmissable event in the herstory of our friendship it's so good that you're here, Amma says, leaning back to enjoy the love the drug is giving her it's good to be here although it's a whistle-stop visit as I'm crossing the ocean again tomorrow, twice in forty-eight hours, just for you, wouldn't do it for anyone else, Ams

it's been a long time since Dominique's been to any of her friend's first nights, the party outside is full of people she hasn't seen in ages, although for a very good reason she had a brief catch-up with Roland during which he namedropped recently having had lunch/dinner/drinks/whatever bollocks with two famous politicians, a rock star, and an artist whose work sold for millions she said she'd never heard of him (she had) Sylvester soared through the crowd like a homing pigeon when he saw her exit the auditorium at the end of the play, to tell her that he and she were among the few anti-establishment combatants of yesteryear who'd maintained their principles uncorrupted it wasn't a coincidence that he waved his hand in Amma's direction Dominique was about to mention her very capitalist festival when she was rescued by someone she'd worked with in the eighties, Linda, a stage manager who used to have urchin looks, and is now built like a Gulag prison guard along with her entourage who stampeded in and elbowed Sylvester out of the way Linda now ran her own film and telly props business, and her friends, who'd been diehard fans of Bush Women Theatre, were car mechanics, electricians, builders she has a lot of time for these women who rejected femininity before it became fashionable it was great to see them again not so Shirley, Amma's oldest friend and the dreariest woman on the planet, who looked horrified when they ended up next to each other at the bar, and forced her lips into an alleged smile she'd once caught Shirley watching Amma kiss a girlfriend at a party, the expression on Shirley's face when she thought she wasn't being observed the woman is a closet homophobe, although Amma won't have it, says Shirley wouldn't be her friend if she was Dominique greeted Shirley effusively, said goodbye effusively and said little in between, what she calls her 'hello-goodbye sandwich' reserved for people she has to be nice to Roland, Sylvester, Shirley

she'd once known them well, now when she sees them about once in a blue moon, sees that their worst traits have intensified Roland is more intensely arrogant, Sylvester more intensely resentful, Shirley more intensely uptight one of the exceptions is Lakshmi, still a great friend, who regularly pops into LA when she's touring to promote her latest album the highlight was seeing Yazz who rushed up and proudly introduced her to two of her confident, articulate university friends, one of them wearing a hijab with sequins that screamed 'yeh, Muslim, funky and proud of it!' the two friends gushed that they'd heard all about her from Yazz, don't worry, you can rest easy, it was all good stuff, nothing slanderous much Yazz suggested Dominique pay for her to spend a month in LA next summer without you know who, as a way for them to bond because you are my Number One godmother who's been absent for most of my childhood, which was quite traumatic growing up with you know who and the Professor of Fucking Everything I could have done with a bit more support, Goddy Dom don't worry, I'm not expecting first class tickets, economy will do and a per diem Yazz is downright feisty and Dominique loves her for it, of course she's going to pay for her to visit she delves into her knapsack on the toilet floor, extracts a black and white photograph, passes it over to Amma remember this? thought I'd bring it to show how far you've come of course, Amma replied, how could I forget? just look at us, the original riot grrrrls or is it gurls now? Yazz will know they were standing on one of this very theatre's exterior balconies, Dominique wearing a bashed-in trilby, old man's coat, ripped tee-shirt, jeans, braces Amma in a bomber jacket, ra-ra skirt, stripy tights, DMs the pair of them scowling and sticking two fingers up at the theatre's thick black lettering high above them look how young we were, Dom, it feels like so long ago

that's because it was, a bygone age, here pass the smelling salts, luv, look at you now, Ams, at the top of your game, my girl, you're a powerhouse, you're unstoppable, that's what you are, as for the closing sequence of the play? afro-gynocentricism caused a femquake tonight Amma feels herself melting against the wall as the flattery seeps into her this is just what she needs everything is perfect just perfect.