62
IVAN
I need more than a shower to wash Cora off of me.
Her smell is everywhere. She has invaded every fiber of my bedroom. Every thought in my head. I’m stripping the sheets in a desperate attempt to exorcize her from the space when there’s a knock on the door.
“Come in.” I wad up the bedding and toss it towards the closet. I might have to burn it to get rid of the strawberries and cream smell of her.
I expect it to be Niles checking to see if there’s anything he can help with, but Yasha pokes his head in. When he sees me, he manages to look even more smug than Anya.
“Long time, no see, partner.”
“Could be longer.” I wave him towards the still open door, hoping he’ll take a hint and leave. But he doesn’t budge.
“I can’t remember the last time you didn’t have your phone on you. This might be a first, actually.”
I rip Cora’s pillowcase off the pillow. Then I see a long strand of her hair tangled in the threading and think better of it. I throw the entire pillow into the pile. I’ll buy new ones.
“A lot of firsts are happening here,” Yasha continues. “According to everyone I talked to, Cora is the first woman you’ve ever brought into your bedroom.”
I whip around. “Who is ‘everyone’? Who did you talk to?”
“Niles.”
I narrow my eyes. “Bullshit. Niles isn’t a gossip.”
“Yeah, but he’s also a shit liar,” he says. “I asked him if Cora was the first woman you’d brought to your room and he tried to dodge the question. But I could tell. She was, wasn’t she?”
Change of plans. Stripping the sheets won’t be enough.
I need to strip memories. I need to turn back time and rewrite the past twenty-four hours.
Anytime anyone mentions her or this weekend, I’ll remember what she felt like underneath me. The way her calf wrapped around my thigh. The scrape of her nails on my shoulder blades and the whispered moan of her breath against my chest as I filled her.
Even amnesia won’t be enough. My body remembers hers.
I’m not sure I’ll ever fully be rid of her.
“If you’re such a good reader of people, go ahead and tell me what this means.” I hold up two very specific fingers, one on each hand.
Yasha laughs. “That’s a ‘yes,’ obviously. Considering the two of you spent the entire day in bed—another first for you—I’m guessing it went well?”
I throw the other pillows into the burn pile and drop down onto the mattress. Somehow, the smell of her still surrounds me.
Yasha pushes himself off the wall. “Why are you acting like this is a bad thing? You had a good time. Revel in it. Share details.”
“I’m not telling you a fucking thing.”
Mostly because I don’t want to encourage him when he gets in this kind of mood.
But also because what we just did feels sacred. Personal. If I tell Yasha, I might as well actually set up a webcam. Let the internet share in the deepest, darkest desires of my heart.
“Fine. But at least look like you enjoyed yourself. I know you did.” He leans in, voice low. “We could hear you.”
I grimace and turn my face away. “It was a distraction.”
“So?” He shrugs. “That’s fine. We all need them from time to time.”
“Maybe. But we don’t all have time for them.”
“That’s what I’m here for, Ivan. You can pass some of this shit to me. Let me handle it so you have time to…to fucking breathe, man. You need that.”
“I’m fine.”
Yasha sighs and leans back against the wall. “That’s a bad attempt at a lie. But you’re a good man, Ivan.”
I hear Cora’s voice. You are a good man, Ivan Pushkin.
“Why the hell does everyone keep saying that?” I mutter.
“But,” Yasha continues as if I hadn’t spoken, “you’re a good man who has too much weight on his shoulders. It turns you into an asshole.”
I snort in surprise. “Thanks, Yasha. How uplifting. I feel so much better.”
“You would feel better if you let yourself enjoy the pleasures of life every now and again. I mean, fuck,” he says, “it wouldn’t be the end of the world if you took a weekend off every once in a while to pile-drive some woman into the sheets. A random woman…or Cora…” I shoot him a warning glare and he holds up his hands. “I’m just saying, it wouldn’t kill you to have some fun.”
That’s all I was doing the night I met Cora. Having a little fun. I was trying to distract myself from the reality that I was going to have to marry a woman I could barely stand.
Fun might be the death of me. Of all of us.
“Tell that to the man who held a gun to my head last night. Having a little fun almost got me killed.”
“I would, if he wasn’t already dead,” Yasha deadpans. “Or if I had any clue who the fuck he is.”
I snap my gaze to him. “You found something?”
“Yes. Er—no. It depends how you look at it. The man has no connection at all to the Sokolov Bratva.”
I frown. “That’s not possible.”
“He’s never even taken a stroll past their headquarters, as far as I could tell. Nothing.” Yasha shakes his head like he can’t believe it, either. “I was positive there would be something, but this guy came out of nowhere.”
After overhearing the two Sokolov guards talking at the restaurant, Yasha and I both assumed the Sokolovs were behind the attacks. It would make sense—my connection to Katerina and the fallout of our engagement. Plus, Konstantin made it clear at my party that he would still love for me to marry one of his pre-teen daughters. The sick fuck.
“The Sokolovs have the clearest motive.”
“Spoken as someone who wasn’t running interference between you and all the women at your party,” Yasha says with raised brows. “When you pulled Stefanos off of Cora and then followed her upstairs, I thought there would be a riot. Whether they saw it firsthand or not, people were whispering about Cora all night.”
Shit.
“I thought we were discreet.”
“You were the belle of the ball. There is no way to be discreet when all eyes are on you.”
That whole night, all I could think about was how much I didn’t want to be there. How much I didn’t want to get married to a woman my father chose. How much I wanted to be anywhere but that party.
And then Cora was there.
I drag a hand down my face. “It could be anyone from the party who saw Cora and I together. Someone who felt like I brushed them off, someone who wanted more time with me and didn’t get it.”
“Exactly. I’m thinking we conduct some unannounced drop-ins on our allies and see if anyone has heard anything.”
“Yes,” I agree. “Waiting for someone to attack Cora again so we can question them isn’t a plan. Fuck what my father says—she isn’t bait.”
Yasha wisely keeps his comments to himself. But I notice his mouth twitch into a smile. “Who should we visit first?”
“Let’s start on the outside and work our way in—someone who has a leg in both worlds. I want to talk to Rooster and Legs. Tonight.”
Now, Yasha can’t help himself. He grins. “You want to drop in on the owners of The Coop, tonight of all nights? How surprising. I can’t imagine why.”
I ignore him. “I want you to oversee security at The Coop. That way, you can be close if I find anything. Otherwise, I want your eyes on Cora the entire time.”
“Sure. Either my eyes or your eyes will be on Cora at all times tonight. I’ll make sure of it.”
I glare at him. “Your eyes. I’m not going to interrupt the bachelorette party. I’m there strictly for business.”
Yasha shrugs. “Business, pleasure—who can really tell the difference these days?”
I pass by him on my way to the door and shove him in the shoulder. “I can.”
I have to.