39
Harriet had solid practice in her life at being alone, feeling alone, and yet she had never experienced such aloneness until these last few weeks. And she was a woman who had, somehow, been made an orphan twice over.
The aftermath of Scott’s post felt as though she was drowning while a group of spectators on dry land jeered and cheered. Even one of her best friends had stood there filing her nails, declining to help, mouthing: what do you expect?
And then a complete stranger strode through the crush, stuck out their hand to her and pulled her out. A good Samaritan. Harriet typed:
I’m not great, to be honest, but so grateful for your comment under that post, and accepting my friend request! Thank you.
A reply pinged back instantly again. Nina was more than she’d have dared hope for.
Oh no problem – he’s a massive bullshit artist, I couldn’t believe my eyes when it popped up in my timeline. I knew he’d delete my comment. He’s blocked me too! You got together with Scott in his late-/your mid-twenties, is that right? Thinking you’re around my age? (I’m thirty-five)
Yes, thirty-four! How did you know when we got together?
Hah cos he massively rubbed my face in it! We’ve got some catching-up to do. I don’t want to be that pushy duck but do you want to chat on the phone? Thinking this is a lot for messages. I’d offer you FaceTime but I’m not dressed and look like a haystack today x
PS DICK! Ducking auto correct
This was more than Harriet could’ve hoped for.
YES! Thank you. x
They swapped numbers, and Harriet called. A woman with a youthful, musical voice with a northern accent answered.
‘Hello! Harriet?’
‘Hi, yes – Nina?’
‘OK, this is surreal, isn’t it,’ Nina chortled. ‘Welcome to the Scott Dyer Survivors’ Club. Membership two, and counting.’
Harriet laughed, with a vaguely hysterical edge.
‘You’re wicked H? Tell me more,’ Nina said. ‘Please ignore any nibbling noises, I was mid-snack.’
She had a laidback manner, and even down phone lines, Harriet felt at ease in her company immediately.
Trying not to gabble, Harriet summarised her years with Scott, the wedding encounter, the letter, and the viral post retribution.
‘Oh this sounds so much like the Scott I remember, it’s almost giving me the willies, Harriet. I always wondered if he’d fixed his shit after me but sounds like he got progressively worse. I’ll tell you how I know when you met him. After we broke up, Scott made sure I saw a photo of you and him together on group messages which was very finally found me a good one, blah blah, gloating. All I heard from friends after was how great you were for him and “chilled him out”, as if I’d been the problem. I wouldn’t say I was jealous of you, as I was so relieved to be shot of him. I definitely had you on a pedestal as the intimidating, beautiful, cool goddess who could handle him, though.’
‘That’s extraordinary to hear, given the reality,’ Harriet said.
Harriet described the dinner party meet-cute and the fact she was later told of a bad break-up.
‘Oh yeah, that must’ve been me. It was bad for him, in as much as my mum and dad staged an intervention. They came round and outright accused him of being my fucking captor, which he was. I was like a boiling frog, you know,’ Nina said, with a bark of a laugh. Harriet did know.
‘I’m so impressed at how you called time on him in the end. If my parents and I weren’t so close and they hadn’t spotted what was going on, I don’t know what I’d have done.’
No one had said they were impressed by Harriet in her private life in a long time, and she didn’t know what to say, other than thanks, and absorb it. She never allowed herself to wonder how she and Scott would’ve gone differently if her parents had been alive; firstly because it was her responsibility, and secondly, it was too painful.
‘We were at the same university in Cardiff and in the third year we both did the same art module,’ Nina said. ‘He was giving it all Mr Sensitive and culture appreciator and blah blah and catching my eye during the life drawing. Now I can see he homed in on me and took an interest in all my interests. When I was twenty-one and naïve I didn’t spot the grooming, I was like wow look, spooky, we’re soulmates. After graduating I was going to get a place with friends and he convinced me to get a flat together, instead. Then it was like we were married and the temper tantrums started and well, you know how he operates. It was like quicksand. Even now I sometimes say to my girlfriend Daisy that I overreact to trivial shit with her as I still think relationships mean someone’s going to check the soles of my shoes when I say I’ve been for a walk in the park. Oh yeah that’s another thing, I like to say Scott turned me on to women. He didn’t, I’m not giving him any credit for anything except why I go to kickboxing, haha.’
Harriet had been silently critical of people who felt they knew Scott based on the briefest of acquaintances, however, she had known Nina for seventeen minutes, and she sincerely loved her.
‘This Marianne’s going to marry him?’ Nina said. ‘Good luck with that! My heart goes out to her.’
Harriet sighed. ‘I was gutted she sold me out and showed him the letter. Having said that, back then, I let him delete my best friend’s number out of my phone. I was the same, I know what he does to your head.’
Harriet would never forget how it felt to turn up on Lorna’s doorstep, post-Scott. She thought she might get a slammed door or shouting; instead, Lorna burst into tears and hugged her. I’m sorry I pushed you away, Harriet had said and Lorna replied, stoutly: It wasn’t you who pushed me away.
‘Yeah it’s a cliché but you have to see it for yourself, don’t you? You have to see him for what he is, and that takes time,’ Nina said, and Harriet’s heart simply soared at having someone to share this with.
‘I was still in denial when my parents steamed in. Almost as soon as I was out of that atmosphere, I started to realise how messed-up it was. That’s the thing. What you need more than anything is distance and perspective and you don’t have them, he makes sure of that.’
‘It becomes your normal,’ Harriet agreed. ‘I want to block him and forget about it but I’m losing work because of it. Everyone thinks I’m the Fatal Attraction girl who they don’t want lurking round their wedding.’
‘That’s so out of order. The reason I commented was to scare him. He needs to realise there are people out here who know the truth, and to wind his neck right fucking in. I wish I could help you.’
‘You have helped, you’ve restored my sanity,’ Harriet said, feeling a little wobbly. ‘Truly, Nina. You’re like a guardian angel.’
‘Your guardian angel probably wouldn’t be eating a vegan Magnum and wearing stretch jorts.’
They both laughed, in nervous exhilaration.
‘Keep my number, let’s stay friends! I hope Scott sees! Except he can’t, if we’re both blocked,’ Nina said.
‘How shit is it that the two of us together, backing each other up, probably still aren’t worth the word of one Scott?’ Harriet said.
‘You never know who else is out there,’ Nina said. ‘Perhaps others will call out his BS, like I did.’
This was a very good point.
‘If there’s anything I can do, you’ll let me know?’ Nina said. ‘I’m in Leeds pretty often. We could meet to brainstorm the perfect murder. Actually, no, I’m not having him relaxing in a nice burial plot, everyone crying and saying nice things about him. Chiselling TOP LAD on his headstone. I want Scott to face up to what he does.’
Harriet said: ‘Amen,’ while thinking, men like Scott never got their comeuppance.
However, she had also believed there was no flaw in Scott’s plot to turn the tables on her, and in fact, there was, and here it was.
Without his attack on ‘H,’ she and Nina would never have found each other. His newfound micro-fame was his undoing – like when the police reported an arrest to get other accusers to come forward.
Minutes later, she discovered Scott Dyer might be thinking the same way: the whole post about ‘H’ had been deleted. It was too late to save Harriet’s reputation, but it was something.