CHAPTER 2
Maria
In the past, when she’d worked in the Mecklenburg County district attorney’s office, Maria Sanchez had been in the courtroom with any number of criminals, some of whom had been charged with the kinds of violent crimes that kept her awake at night. She’d had nightmares about various cases and had been threatened by a sociopath, but the simple fact was that she’d never been quite as frightened back then as she felt right now on this deserted stretch as that car, driven by that guy, suddenly pulled to the side of the road.
It didn’t matter that she was twenty-eight, or that she’d graduated summa cum laude from UNC Chapel Hill, or that she’d gone to law school at Duke. It didn’t matter that she’d been a rising star in the district attorney’s office before finding other work at one of the best legal firms in Wilmington, or that until that moment, she’d always had a pretty good handle on her emotions. As soon as he stepped out of the car, all those truths went out the window and the only thing she could think was that she was a young woman all alone in the middle of nowhere. When he began to walk toward her, panic flooded through her. I’m going to die out here, she suddenly realized, and no one’s ever going to find my body.
Moments earlier, when his car had slowly drifted past hers, she’d seen him staring at her—almost leering, like he was sizing her up—and her first thought was that he’d been wearing a mask, which was terrifying enough, but way less scary than the sudden realization that she’d actually seen his face. It was bruised on both sides; one eye was swollen shut, the other one bright red and bloody. She was pretty sure that even more blood was dripping down his forehead, and it had been all she could do not to start screaming. But for whatever reason, not a sound escaped her. For the love of God, she remembered thinking as soon as he’d passed, please keep going. Whatever you do, please don’t stop.
But obviously God hadn’t been listening. Why would God intervene to keep her from ending up dead in a ditch out in the middle of nowhere? He wouldn’t. Instead, He’d decided to have the guy pull over, and now a man with a mangled face was gliding toward her like something out of a low-budget horror film. Or prison, from which he’d just escaped, because the guy was positively ripped, and wasn’t that what prisoners did? Lift weights all the time? His haircut was severe, almost military style—the signature of one of the gangs in prison she’d heard about? The ratty black concert T-shirt didn’t help, nor did the torn-up jeans, and the way he was holding his jacket freaked her out. In this storm, why wasn’t he wearing it? Maybe he was using it to hide…
A knife.
Or, God forbid, a gun…
A squeak escaped her throat and her mind began racing through options as she tried to figure out what to do. Toss the tire at him? She couldn’t even get the thing out of the trunk. Scream for help? There was no one nearby, not a single car had passed in the last ten minutes, and she’d left her cell phone God knows where or she wouldn’t have been trying to change the tire in the first place. Run? Maybe, but the liquid ease with which he moved suggested he’d easily catch her. The only thing she could do was get back into the car and lock the doors, but he was already right there, and there was no way to get past him…
“Need a hand?”
It was the sound of his voice that jolted her out of her trance. Letting go of the tire, she began backing away, focusing only on creating distance between the two of them. Lightning flashed again and she noticed a blankness in his expression, almost like something elemental was missing in his personality, the piece that signaled that it wasn’t okay to rape and kill women.
“What do you want with me?” she finally choked out.
“I don’t want anything,” he answered.
“Then what are you doing here?”
“I thought you might need some help changing your tire.”
“I’m fine,” she said. “I can handle it myself.”
He looked from her to the flat tire, then back to her again. “Okay. Good night,” he said. Wheeling around, he started back toward his car, his figure suddenly receding. His reaction was so unexpected that for a second she felt paralyzed. He was leaving? Why was he leaving? She was glad about that—actually, she was thrilled about that—and yet, and yet…
“I’m having trouble getting the tire out of the trunk!” she said, hearing the panic in her own voice.
He turned on his heel as he reached his car. “Seems like it.” He reached for his door and pulled it open, ready to climb in—
“Wait!” she suddenly cried.
He squinted at her through the downpour. “Why?” he called back.
Why? She wasn’t sure she’d heard him right. But then again, she’d told him she didn’t need any help. And she didn’t, except that she did, but it wasn’t as though she could call anyone, and with her thoughts racing and jumbled, the next words spilled out involuntarily.
“Do you have a phone?” she shouted.
He closed some of the gap between, stopping when he could be heard without shouting, but not getting too close. Thank God. “Yes,” he answered.
She shifted from one foot to the other, thinking Now what? “I lost my phone,” she said. “I mean, I didn’t lose lose it.” She knew she was rambling, but the way he kept staring at her made the words impossible to stop. “It’s either at the office or I left it at my parents’, but I won’t know for sure until I get to my MacBook.”
“Okay.” He added nothing else; instead, he stood unmoving, his eyes steady on hers.
“I use that Find My iPhone thing. The app, I mean. I can track my phone because it’s synced with the computer.”
“Okay.”
“Well?”
“Well what?”
“Can I borrow yours for a minute? I want to call my sister.”
“Sure,” he answered. He tucked the phone into the folds of his jacket and as he began to approach, she reflexively took another step backward. He placed the jacket on the hood of her car and gestured at it.
She hesitated. He was definitely odd, but she appreciated the fact that he’d stepped away. She hurried to the bundle and found his iPhone tucked inside, the same model as hers. When she pressed the button, the screen lit up and sure enough, he was getting service. But it wouldn’t do any good unless…
“Five-six-eight-one,” he offered.
“You’re giving me your code?”
“You can’t access the phone without it,” he noted.
“Aren’t you worried about giving it to a stranger?”
“Are you going to steal my phone?”
She blinked. “No. Of course not.”
“Then I’m not worried.”
She wasn’t sure what to say to that, but whatever. She typed in the code with trembling fingers and dialed her sister. By the third ring, she knew she’d get Serena’s voice mail. Maria did her best to keep her frustration in check as she left a message, explaining what had happened to the car and asking her sister to come pick her up. She tucked the phone back into the jacket on the hood and then stepped away, watching him.
“No answer?” he asked.
“She’s coming.”
“Okay.” When the lightning flashed again, he motioned toward the rear of her car. “While you’re waiting for her, do you want me to change your tire?”
She opened her mouth to again decline his offer, but who knew when—or if—Serena would get her message? And then there was the fact that she’d never actually changed a tire in her life. Instead of answering, she let out a breath, trying to keep the tremor from her voice. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Yes.”
“What… what happened to your face?”
“I was in a fight.”
She waited a few beats before finally realizing he wasn’t going to add anything else. That’s it? No further explanation? His demeanor was so utterly foreign, she wasn’t sure what to make of it. As he stood in place, obviously waiting for the answer to his earlier question, she glanced at the trunk, wishing she actually knew how to change a tire.
“Yes,” she finally said. “If you wouldn’t mind, I’d love some help changing the tire.”
“Okay.” He nodded. She watched as he reached for the bundle on the hood and tucked his phone back into his pocket before slipping his jacket on. “You’re afraid of me,” he said.
“What?”
“You’re afraid I’m going to hurt you.” When she said nothing, he went on. “I won’t, but whether you believe that is up to you.”
“Why are you telling me this?”
“Because if I’m going to change your tire, I’m going to have to approach the trunk. Which means I’ll be approaching you, too.”
“I’m not afraid of you,” she lied.
“Okay.”
“I’m not.”
“Okay,” he said again, then started toward her. She felt her heart squeeze as he passed within arm’s reach of her, only to feel foolish when he walked right past without slowing. He unscrewed something, then lifted the spare tire out and set it aside before he disappeared behind the trunk again, no doubt to retrieve the jack.
“One of us needs to move your car onto the road,” he said. “It needs to be level before I get the jack going, otherwise the car might slip.”
“But I’ve got a flat tire.”
He peeked around the side, jack in hand. “It won’t hurt the car. Just go slow.”
“But it will block most of the lane.”
“It’s blocking half the lane already.”
He had a point there… but…
But what if that was all part of his plan? To distract her somehow? To get her to turn her back?
A plan that included letting me use his phone? And removing the tire from the trunk?
Rattled and self-conscious, she got into the car and started the engine, slowly but surely edging it back onto the road and setting the emergency brake. By the time she opened the door, he was rolling the spare toward the rear tire, lug wrench in hand.
“You can stay in the car if you want,” he said. “This shouldn’t take long.”
She debated before closing the door, then spent several minutes watching in the side mirror as he continued to loosen the bolts before sliding the jack into place. A moment later, she could feel the car lifting slightly, bouncing its way slowly upward and then stopping. She watched as he finished unscrewing the bolts before sliding the tire off, just as the storm began to intensify, rain blowing in gusty sheets. The spare went on quickly, along with the bolts, and then all at once, the car was being lowered again. He placed the flat tire back in her trunk along with the jack and the lug wrench, and she felt him gently push the trunk closed. And just like that, it was over. Still, she startled a little when he tapped on her window. She lowered the glass and rain began to spit through the opening. With his face still shadowed, it was almost possible to see past the bruises and the swelling and the bloody eye. Almost, but not entirely.
“You’re good to go,” he shouted over the gale, “but you should probably get the tire fixed or replace it sooner rather than later. Your spare isn’t meant to be used permanently.”
She nodded, but before she could thank him, he had already turned and was jogging toward his car. He jerked his door open and slid behind the wheel. She heard the roar of his engine and then—before she knew it—she was alone on the road again, albeit now in a car that would get her home.
“I heard the phone ring, but I didn’t recognize the number so I let it go to voice mail,” Serena said in between sips of orange juice. Beside her at the table on the back porch, Maria nursed a cup of coffee, the morning sunlight already warming the air. “Sorry about that.”
“Well, next time, just answer, okay?”
“Can’t do that.” Serena smiled. “What if it was some crazy person trying to reach me?”
“That was the problem! I was with a crazy person and I needed you to rescue me.”
“It doesn’t sound like it. He sounds like a nice guy.”
Maria glared at her over the rim of her coffee mug. “You didn’t see him. Trust me. I’ve seen scary people, and he was beyond scary.”
“He told you he’d been in a fight…”
“And that’s the point. He’s obviously violent.”
“But he wasn’t the least bit violent toward you—you said he didn’t even go near you at first. And then he let you borrow his phone. And after that, he changed your tire and then got back in his car and drove away.”
“You’re missing the point.”
“What point? That you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover?”
“I’m being serious here!”
Serena laughed. “Wow, someone’s touchy. And you know I’m just teasing you. If it was me out there, I probably would have peed my pants. Broken car, deserted road, no phone, blood on some stranger’s face… it’s like every girl’s worst nightmare.”
“Exactly.”
“Did you ever find your phone?”
“It’s at the office. Probably still on my desk.”
“You mean it’s been there since Friday? And you didn’t realize you didn’t have it until Saturday night?”
“So?”
“I guess not too many people call you, huh?”
“Ha, ha.”
Serena shook her head, then reached for her phone. “I can’t live without mine, just so you know.” She snapped a quick photo of Maria.
“What’s that for?”
“Instagram.”
“Seriously?”
Serena was already tapping away. “Don’t worry. It’ll be funny,” she added before presenting the image and caption. “Maria, after surviving Nightmare on Dark Street.”
“You’re not going to post that, are you?”
“Already did.” Serena winked.
“You’ve got to stop posting about me. I’m serious. What if one of my clients finds it?”
“Then blame me.” She shrugged. “Where’s Dad, by the way?”
“He’s still walking Copo,” she said. Copo was a female, nearly all-white shih tzu. After Serena had moved to the dorms, she and Maria had returned home one Christmas to find that their parents had purchased a dog. Now Copo went practically everywhere with them: to the restaurant—where she had her own bed in the office—to the supermarket, even to the accountant. Copo was far more spoiled than either of the girls had ever been.
“I still can’t get over it,” Serena muttered. “They love that dog.”
“Ya think?”
“Did you notice the rhinestone collar Mom bought? I almost gagged.”
“Be nice.”
“I am being nice!” Serena said. “I just never pictured them owning a dog in the first place. We never had one growing up, and I begged them for one for years. I even promised to take care of it.”
“That’s because they knew you wouldn’t.”
“I might not have skipped a grade and gone to college when I was seventeen like you, but I’m pretty sure I could have handled a dog. And I’ll have you know that I’m in the running for the Charles Alexander Scholarship next year.”
“Mmm, right.” Maria raised a skeptical eyebrow.
“I’m serious. It’s for bilingual education majors. I filled out the application, wrote an essay, got recommendations from two of my professors and everything. It’s sponsored by a private foundation, and I have an interview with the chairman next Saturday. So there.” She crossed her arms.
“Wow. That’s great.”
“Don’t tell Dad, though. I want to surprise him.”
“He’d be thrilled if you won.”
“I know, right? Just think how many more collars they’d be able to buy Copo if he didn’t have to pay tuition.”
Maria laughed. Inside, they could hear their mother humming to herself in the kitchen, the smell of huevos rancheros drifting through the open window.
“But anyway,” Serena went on, “back to last night. Why were you out so late? That’s way past your normal bedtime.”
Maria scowled at her sister before figuring that she might as well get it over with. “Actually, I was on a date.”
“No way.”
“What’s the big deal?”
“Nothing. I just thought that you’d made the decision to be celibate.”
“Why would you say that?”
“Hello? Did you forget who I was talking to?”
“I go out.”
“You might paddleboard, but you don’t go out at night. Instead, you work. You read. You watch bad TV. You don’t even go dancing anymore, and you used to love that. And I tried to get you to come to that warehouse with me, remember? With the salsa dancing on Saturday nights?”
“As I recall, you said there were a lot of creepy guys there.”
“But I also had a lot of fun. And unlike you, I’m terrible at dancing.”
“Not all of us are in college, you know, with classes that start at noon and Fridays off. Some of us have responsibilities.”
“Yeah, yeah, I’ve heard that before,” Serena said, waving it off. “I take it you didn’t get lucky?”
Maria peeked over her shoulder toward the partially open window, making sure her mother wasn’t listening.
Serena rolled her eyes. “You’re an adult, you know. You don’t have to hide your social life from Mom and Dad anymore.”
“Yeah, well, we’ve always been a little different in that way.”
“What? You think I tell them everything?”
“I hope not.”
Serena stifled a giggle. “Sorry your date didn’t work out.”
“How do you know? Maybe it did.”
“I don’t think so,” Serena said, shaking her head. “Otherwise you wouldn’t have been heading home alone.”
Oops, Maria thought. Serena had always been quick-thinking, but more than that, she was endowed with a common sense that sometimes eluded Maria.
“Hello?” Serena added. “Anyone home? I was asking about your date.”
“I don’t think he’ll be calling me.”
Serena feigned compassion, though her amused cynicism was apparent. “Why? Did you bring your computer and work the whole time?”
“No. And it wasn’t me. It was just… bad.”
“Talk to me, big sister. Tell me all about it.”
Maria surveyed the backyard, reflecting that Serena was the only person in the world she could really talk to. “There’s really not that much to tell. For starters, I didn’t plan on having a date in the first place—”
“No! You?”
“Do you want to hear this or not?”
“My mistake.” Serena grinned. “Go on.”
“You remember Jill, right? My friend from work?”
“Super smart, coming up on forty and dying to get married, funny as hell? The one who came over for brunch and scooped Copo up and almost gave Dad a heart attack?”
“Yes.”
“No, I don’t remember her.”
“Anyway,” Maria said, “we were having lunch a few days ago and she convinced me to join her and her boyfriend, Paul, for dinner, after I got back from the conference. But unbeknownst to me, it turns out that they had also invited one of Paul’s friends from work to join us, and—”
“Wait, back up. Was the guy hot?”
“He was definitely handsome. But the problem was, he knew it. He was rude and arrogant and he flirted with the waitress all night long. I think he even got her phone number while I was sitting beside him.”
“Classy.”
“Jill was as mortified as I was, but the strange thing was, I’m not sure that Paul even noticed. Maybe it was the wine or whatever, but he kept saying that the four of us should head out to a club afterwards and that he was so glad we were getting along, that he just knew we’d be perfect for each other. Which is strange, because he’s not normally like that. Usually he’s quiet and Jill and I do all the talking.”
“Maybe he just likes his friend. Or maybe he thought that you and his friend would make pretty babies and you might name one after him.”
Despite herself, Maria laughed. “Maybe. But anyway, I don’t think I’m his type. I’m pretty sure he’d be more comfortable with someone…”
When Maria trailed off, Serena finished. “Dumber?”
“I was thinking blonder, like the waitress.”
“Yeah, well, just so you know, that’s always been part of your problem when it comes to guys. You’re too smart. And to guys, that’s kind of intimidating.”
“Not all guys. Luis and I were together for over two years.”
“Were together,” Serena said. “Those are the operative words. And just so you know? He may have been sexy as hell, but Luis was a total loser.”
“He wasn’t that bad.”
“Don’t start getting all nostalgic about the good things about him. It wasn’t like you ever had a future with him and you know it.”
Maria nodded, knowing Serena was right but indulging momentarily in a bit of nostalgia anyway before shutting it down. “Yeah, well, live and learn.”
“I’m just glad you decided to start dating again.”
“I didn’t. Jill and Paul decided for me.”
“Whatever. You need to be…”
While Serena searched for the right words, Maria suggested, “More like you?”
“Why not? Going out, enjoying life, making friends? It beats working all the time.”
“How would you know? You only work a couple of shifts a week.”
“Good point. I’m just making an assumption based on your lack of a social life.”
“Believe it or not, I actually like working.”
“I’ll make sure to put that on your tombstone,” Serena said. “How’s work going, by the way?”
Maria shifted in her seat, wondering how much to say. “It’s all right.”
“You just said you liked it.”
“I do, but…”
“Let me guess… the conference, right? The one you went to with your boss?” When Maria nodded, Serena went on. “Was it as awful as you thought it might be?”
“Not exactly awful, but…”
“Did he hit on you?”
“Sort of,” Maria admitted. “But it wasn’t anything I couldn’t handle.”
“This is the guy who’s married? With three kids?”
“That’s the one.”
“You need to tell him to knock it off. Threaten him with sexual harassment, or whatever.”
“It’s more complicated than that. For now, it’s probably better for me if I just try to ignore it.” When a slight smirk began to play across Serena’s lips, Maria went on. “What?”
“I was just thinking that you really have a way with men. Your old boyfriend cheated on you, your latest date flirts with other girls, and meanwhile, your boss won’t stop hitting on you.”
“Welcome to my world.”
“Of course, it’s not all bad. You met a nice guy last night. The kind of guy who helps a woman in her time of need, despite a raging storm…”
When Maria scowled, Serena laughed and went on. “I really wish I could have seen your face.”
“It wasn’t pretty.”
“And yet here you are, safe and sound,” Serena reminded her. “And I’m happy about that, if only so that you have continued access to my wisdom.”
“You really need to work on your self-esteem issues,” Maria said sourly.
“I know, right? But seriously, I’m glad you moved back to town. These brunches would be deadly if you weren’t here. Having you around gives Mom and Dad someone else to worry about.”
“I’m glad I can be of service to you.”
“I appreciate it. And besides, we’ve had a chance to get to know each other better.”
“We’ve always known each other.”
“You went off to college when I was ten.”
“And I came home almost every weekend, and spent every vacation here.”
“That’s true. You were kind of wimpy like that. For the first couple of years, you were so homesick, you’d cry all weekend.”
“It was hard to be so far from home.”
“Why do you think I go to college here? In that way, I’m almost as smart as you are.”
“You’re smart. You might get a scholarship, remember?”
“I’m not smart like you. But that’s okay. It’ll make it much easier to find a guy in the end—not that I’m interested in anything serious. But listen, if you want, I’d be happy to keep a lookout for you. I meet guys all the time.”
“College guys?”
“Some of them might just like an older woman.”
“You’re insane.”
“I don’t know. I tend to have pretty good taste.”
“Are you referring to Steve?”
“We’re just going out. It’s not serious yet. But he seems like a nice guy. He even volunteers at the Humane Society, doing pet adoptions on Sundays.”
“Do you like him?”
“You mean… like like? Or just like?”
“What? Are we in middle school now?”
Serena laughed. “I’m not sure how I feel yet. But he’s cute, which gives me more time to find out.”
“When do I get to meet him?”
“Well… let’s see where it goes. Because if you’re going to meet him, then Mom and Dad will want to meet him, and then I lose control of the whole situation. No matter what happens after that, he’ll think that I think it’s serious, and unlike you, I’m too young to settle down.”
“I don’t want to settle down yet, either.”
“Maybe. But you definitely need a date.”
“Would you stop?”
“Okay, fine. You don’t need a date. What you need is to get lucky.”
When Maria didn’t bother responding, Serena giggled. “Touched a nerve, huh?” she chirped. “Okay, never mind. What’s on your agenda today? After we get out of here? Are you going paddleboarding again?”
“I was thinking about it.”
“Alone?”
“Unless you want to try it again.”
“Not a chance. I still don’t understand why you like it so much. It’s not like dancing. It’s boring.”
“It’s good exercise. And it’s peaceful.”
“Didn’t I just say that?” Serena asked.
Maria smiled. “How about you? What are your plans?”
“I’m going to take a nice long nap. And then, after that, I’ll play it by ear.”
“I hope you find something to do. I’d hate for you to miss a wild Sunday night on Greek row.”
“Now, now… jealousy’s an ugly thing,” Serena said. She hooked her thumb toward the windows. “Dad’s finally back and I’m starved. Let’s go eat.”
Later that afternoon, while Serena was no doubt sound asleep, Maria was on her paddleboard in Masonboro Sound, a place that had long since become her favorite spot to spend a weekend afternoon. Masonboro Island was the largest barrier island along the southern coast of the state, and while she sometimes navigated to the Atlantic side of the island, most of the time she preferred the glassy waters of the marsh. As always, the wildlife was spectacular. In her first hour on the water, she’d seen ospreys, pelicans, and egrets and had taken what she thought were some pretty good photographs. In June, for her birthday, she’d treated herself to a high-quality waterproof camera, and though it had been a financial stretch and she was still paying off the credit card bill, she hadn’t yet regretted it. While they wouldn’t end up in National Geographic, a few of her photos had been good enough to hang on the walls of her condominium, which was a prudent decorating option since she could barely afford the condo, either.
But out here, it was easy to think about those things without necessarily worrying about them. Though she’d only taken up paddleboarding since she’d moved back to Wilmington, it had the same effect on her that dancing used to have. She’d reached the point where keeping her balance was effortless and the steady paddling rhythm melted the stress away. Usually, within a few minutes of being on the water she was left with the sensation that all was right with the world. It was a warm, relaxing glow that started in her neck and shoulders before spreading to the rest of her body, and by the time she was in the shower after returning home, she’d feel ready to face yet another week in the office. Serena was wrong about paddleboarding. It wasn’t boring; it was necessary these days for her mental health, and she had to admit it wasn’t half bad for her figure, either. In the last year, she’d become toned in places she didn’t even know could be toned, and she’d had to have her suits altered because they’d grown too loose in the waist and butt.
Not that it would matter. Serena might have been wrong about paddleboarding, but she had been right about Maria’s run of bad luck in her love life, starting with Luis. He was the first guy she’d ever been serious about, the first guy she’d ever really loved. They’d been friends for almost a year before they’d finally started going out, and on the surface, they had a lot in common. Like her, he was the child of Mexican immigrants and intended to become a lawyer; like her, he enjoyed dancing, and after they’d been dating for a couple of years, it had been easy for her to imagine a future with him. Luis, on the other hand, had made it clear that he was content to continue going out—and sleeping with her—as long as she never expected anything more than that. Even bringing up the subject of marriage had freaked him out, and while she’d initially tried to convince herself that it didn’t really matter, she’d known deep down that it did.
Still, in the end, the breakup had been a surprise; he’d simply called one evening and told her it was over. She’d eventually tried to console herself with the facts that they wanted different things in life and Luis simply wasn’t ready for the kind of commitment she knew she wanted. But then? Just a little over a year later, right after she’d taken the bar exam, she’d learned that he was engaged. She’d spent the next six weeks in a funk, trying to figure out why the other girl had been good enough to marry while he hadn’t even been able to discuss the subject with her. Where had she gone wrong? Had she been too pushy? Too boring? Or too… something else? Looking back, she had no idea. Of course, the whole experience would have been easier if she’d met someone else after Luis, but with every passing year she found herself wondering more and more where all the good guys had gone. Or even if there really was such a thing anymore. Where were the guys who didn’t expect you to sleep with them after only a date or two? Or guys who believed that picking up the check on a first date was a classy thing to do? Or even a guy with a somewhat decent job and plans for the future? God knows, after she and Luis had broken up, she’d put herself out there. Despite the long hours she spent studying in law school and then later, working in Charlotte, she’d gone out regularly with friends on the weekends, but had anyone halfway decent asked her out?
She momentarily broke off her paddling, allowing the board to glide as she straightened up, stretching her back. Well, actually, they probably had, she thought. But back then, she’d tended to focus first on their appearance, and she could remember saying no to a few guys who hadn’t been quite cute enough. And maybe that had been the problem. Maybe she’d turned down Mr. Right because he hadn’t been tall enough or whatever, and now—because he was Mr. Right—he was already off the market. These days, it seemed like Mr. Rights tended to fly off the shelves, perhaps because they were as rare as California condors.
Most of the time, it didn’t bother her. She was different from her mom, who believed that a woman’s relationship status defined her. She had her own life, she could come and go as she pleased, and while she didn’t have anyone to take care of her, she didn’t have to take care of anyone else, either. Yet in the past couple of years—as she began inching closer to thirty—there had been moments when she thought that it might be nice to have someone to go dancing with, or who would join her while she paddleboarded, or even someone willing to listen to her complain after a bad day at work. Having a wide circle of friends, like Serena did, might have filled that void, but most of Maria’s friends lived in either the Raleigh or Charlotte areas, and getting together with them almost always meant a road trip and sleeping on someone’s couch. Aside from her immediate family, relatives, Jill, and a few other coworkers—and, yes, even Paul, despite the other night—the only people she knew here were those she’d gone to high school with, and because she’d been away for years, they’d drifted apart. She supposed that she could try to reestablish contact, but by the time she finished up at work, all she usually wanted to do was unwind in the bathtub with a glass of wine and a good book. Or, if she felt energetic, maybe hit the water on the paddleboard. Even friendships took energy, and lately she didn’t have enough to go around. While that meant her life wasn’t all that exciting, it was also the kind of low-key predictability she needed. Her last year in Charlotte had been traumatic, and…
She shook her head, forcing away the memory of that final year. Taking a calming breath, she told herself firmly to focus on the positive, as she’d trained herself to do. There were a lot of good things in her life. She had her family, her own place, and a job she enjoyed…
Are you sure about that?, the little voice inside her suddenly asked. Because you know that’s not quite true.
It had started off well enough, but wasn’t that always the case? Martenson, Hertzberg & Holdman was a midsize firm, and she worked principally for the primary litigator, Barney Holdman, doing insurance defense work. Barney was in his early sixties and a rainmaker for the firm, a legal genius who wore seersucker suits and spoke with a slow, heavy drawl straight from the mountains of North Carolina. To both clients and juries, he came across as the friendly grandfather type, but beneath the surface, he was hard-driving, prepared for everything, and demanding of associates. In working for him, she had the privilege of time, expertise, and money to prepare her cases, all of which was a far cry from her work as a prosecutor.
Jill was a bonus. As the only women in the office aside from secretaries and paralegals, who had their own cliques, Jill and Maria had hit it off right away, even though they worked in different departments. They had lunch together three or four times a week, and Jill often dropped by Maria’s office just to visit for a few minutes. She was quick-witted and made Maria laugh, but had an incisive legal mind and was one of the firm’s key assets. Why she hadn’t been made partner yet was a mystery. Maria sometimes wondered whether Jill was long for the firm, though she’d said nothing directly about it.
The real problem was Ken Martenson, the managing partner of the firm, who seemed to hire paralegals based on their attractiveness as opposed to their qualifications and spent too much time hovering around their desks. That part didn’t necessarily bother Maria, nor did it bother her to see Ken fraternizing with one paralegal or another in a manner that sometimes seemed less than entirely professional. Jill had filled her in on Ken’s reputation during Maria’s first week on the job, especially his interest in attractive paralegals, but Maria had shrugged it off. That is, until Ken began to set his sights on her. It wasn’t a good development, and lately the situation was getting even more complicated. It was one thing to try to avoid Ken at the office, where there were always other people around, but the conference in Winston-Salem they’d attended last week had amplified her fears that things might get worse. Though Ken hadn’t gone so far as to walk her to her hotel room door—thank God for small favors—he had pressured her into joining him for dinner both nights. And then? He’d given her the whole my wife just doesn’t appreciate me spiel while continually asking whether she wanted another glass of wine, despite the fact that she’d barely touched the first one. He’d talked about his place at the beach and how quiet and relaxing it was and noted more than once that it was usually empty. If she ever wanted to use it, all she had to do was ask. And had he mentioned how rare it was to work with someone who was both intelligent and beautiful?
Could the man have been more obvious? Nevertheless, when he’d hinted at what he wanted, she’d played dumb and then steered the subject back to the issues discussed at the conference. And it had worked, for the most part, but she hadn’t been lying to Serena when she’d said it was complicated. Sometimes she wished that someone would have told her before she applied to law school that being an attorney wasn’t quite the job guarantee she’d always imagined it would be. In the past few years, firms of all sizes had been cutting back, salaries were dropping, and right now there were too many lawyers chasing too few positions. After she’d left the district attorney’s office, it had taken her nearly five months to land this job, and as far as she knew, none of the other firms in town were hiring. If she even mumbled the words sexual harassment or vaguely hinted about filing a lawsuit, she probably wouldn’t be able to find another job in the entire state. Lawyers hated no one more than other lawyers who might sue them.
For the time being, she was stuck. She’d made it through the conference but vowed not to put herself in that kind of situation again. She’d avoid the break room and be a bit more cautious about working late, especially when she knew Ken would be there. For now, that was all she could do, aside from pray that he turned his sights back on one of the paralegals.
It was yet another example of the ways in which life had turned out to be more difficult than she’d imagined it would. When she’d started her first real job, she’d been idealistic; life had seemed more like an adventure. She’d fully believed that she had a meaningful role to play in keeping the streets safe and in giving victims a way to seek justice and redress. But over time, she’d begun to grow jaded about the entire process. It had become evident that even dangerous criminals often went free, the clogged wheels of the system turned impossibly slowly, and her caseload was never-ending. Now she was living again in the city where she’d grown up and practicing a kind of law vastly different from what she’d known as an assistant DA. While she’d been certain that things would be better once she was settled in, she’d slowly come to realize that job stress simply came in different flavors, and this one wasn’t much better tasting than the one before it.
She’d been surprised by that, but then, she’d been surprised by almost everything in the last seven years. The world might view her as a young, home-owning professional, but there were moments when she felt like she was faking the whole thing. Part of it was financial—after paying her bills at the end of the month, she had less spending money than she’d had as a teenager—but the other part was that most of her friends from college were already married, and some of them already had kids. When she talked to them, most came across as completely content, as though their lives were unfolding exactly as they’d planned, while she, on the other hand, had a sex-crazed boss, a condo she could barely afford, and a younger sister who seemed simultaneously wiser and more carefree than Maria was. If this was adulthood, she wondered now why she’d been in such a rush to grow up in the first place.
For the next hour, she pulled steadily at the paddle, the board gliding forward as she did her best to enjoy her surroundings. She noted the slowly shifting clouds and the trees reflected in the water. She concentrated on the salty fresh scent of the breeze and basked in the warmth of the sun on her arms and shoulders. Every now and then she snapped a photograph, including a good one of an osprey clasping a fish in its talons as it rose from the water. It was too shadowed in the viewfinder and a little too distant, but with enough work in Photoshop, it might be something worth keeping.
When she finally returned home, she showered and poured herself a glass of wine, then sat in a rocking chair she’d placed in the small confines of her rear porch. She watched people as they walked along Market Street, idly wondering what their lives were like. She liked to invent stories about them—That one’s probably visiting from New York, or I’ll bet that mom is taking her kids out for ice cream. It was a harmless, relaxing capstone to a weekend that had its share of both highs and lows.
Like the blown tire. Which reminded her that she’d have to run out tomorrow to get it replaced. But when? She knew that while she’d been out of the office at the conference, Barney had filled her inbox with work. They also had two important meetings in the afternoon, which wasn’t going to make it easy. Nor did she have any idea what Ken’s next move would be.
The sense of dread intensified the following morning, when she spotted Ken speaking with Barney in his office while she chatted with Lynn, the voluptuous, though less than efficient, paralegal assigned to Barney’s team. Ken and Barney often met before the Monday morning meeting, but what was unusual was that after Ken left Barney’s office, he’d simply nodded at her without smiling before striding down the hallway. Part of her was relieved by the brevity of the encounter, but at the same time, the sudden frosty professionalism left a bad feeling in her stomach, because it no doubt meant he was angry at her.
A few minutes later, Jill poked her head in to apologize for the blind date, clearly mortified. They talked for a few minutes—Jill was heading out of town for the rest of the week for depositions—and Maria repeated to Jill the story she’d told Serena about her flat tire and the stranger who had rescued her, which only made Jill feel even worse.
As soon as Jill left, Maria started calling garages, trying to find someplace close where she could get her tire changed after work, but soon discovered that all of them would be closed by the time she arrived. Her only option was to try to get it done over her lunch hour. It took six attempts before she was finally able to snag an appointment at half past noon—cutting it close for the initial client meeting at one thirty. She warned Barney that she might be a few minutes late getting back. He frowned but told her to do her best, emphasizing that her presence was important. She left the office at a quarter to twelve, hoping that the mechanics would be able to start early.
But they didn’t start early. Nor did they even start on time. In the end, she spent the next hour waiting, alternating between panic and slowly mounting fury, making calls to Barney’s secretary and the paralegal, as well as to Barney’s cell phone. It wasn’t until after two that she was finally able to reclaim her car and speed back to the office. By the time she reached the conference room, the meeting had been in progress for nearly forty-five minutes. An icy stare from Barney signaled his displeasure, belying his slow, easy drawl as he welcomed her into the conference room.
After the meeting, she apologized profusely to Barney. He was clearly irate; gone was any trace of the friendly grandfather that clients were accustomed to. Things remained tense between them for the rest of the afternoon. It was no better the following day, and pouring herself into the various tasks at hand, Maria caught up on the matters she’d ignored while at the conference, in addition to preparing the documents she knew Barney needed for a trial the following week. She labored past midnight on both Monday and Tuesday, and with Jill out of the office, she worked through her lunch hours all week, eating takeout at her desk while toiling on various briefs. Barney apparently didn’t notice or care, and it wasn’t until Thursday that his icy demeanor began to thaw.
Later that afternoon, however—as she was finishing up a conversation with Barney in his office concerning an insurance claim that they both strongly suspected was fraudulent—she heard a voice behind her. Looking up, she saw Ken standing in the doorway.
“Excuse me,” he said, addressing them both but mainly focusing on Barney. “Would you mind if I spoke to Maria for a moment?”
“Not at all,” Barney drawled. He nodded at Maria. “Give them a ring and let them know that we’ll need to set a conference call for tomorrow.”
“Absolutely. I’ll let you know what they say,” Maria responded. She could feel Ken staring at her, could feel the tightness in her chest as she turned to face him. By then, Ken had already turned to leave, and without a word, she followed him down the hallway and through the reception area. Her feet dragged when she realized he was heading toward his office. As they approached, his secretary averted her gaze.
Ken held the door open for her, then closed it behind him. All business now, he moved behind his desk and gestured for her to sit in the chair opposite. He gazed out the window before finally turning to face her.
“Barney mentioned to me that you missed an important client meeting on Monday.”
“I didn’t miss it. I was late—”
“I didn’t call you here to quibble over the details,” he said, cutting her off. “Would you care to explain what happened?”
Caught off guard, Maria stammered out an admittedly pathetic account of her attempts to find a suitable garage and the events that had followed.
When she was finished, he said nothing for a moment. “You do understand what we do here, right? And why you were hired? Our clients expect a certain level of professionalism.”
“Yes, of course I do. And I know our clients are important.”
“Did you know that Barney was thinking of allowing you the opportunity to act as lead counsel on this matter? And that you took this opportunity off the table because you felt the suddenly urgent, desperate need to change your tire during business hours?”
Maria flushed, her thoughts spinning at this new revelation. “No, he didn’t mention that,” she sputtered. “And like I said, I wanted to get it done after work, but every place would have already been closed. I honestly thought I could get back in time. I knew there was a risk, but—”
“A risk you were clearly more than willing to take,” he observed, again cutting her off.
She opened her mouth to respond, but by then, she knew already that there was nothing she could say to appease him. In the silence, Maria felt a knot form in her stomach as Ken finally took a seat at his desk.
“I must say that I’m very disappointed in your decision,” he said, sounding in control. “We took the risk of hiring you because I, among others, went to bat for you. Your work at the DA’s office was hardly relevant to our practice here, as you know. But I thought you had potential. Now, I’m not sure what to think or whether I made the wrong decision.”
“I’m really sorry. It won’t happen again.”
“I hope not. For your sake, not mine.”
The knot in her stomach grew even larger. “What can I do to make things right?”
“For now, nothing. I’ll talk to Barney and find out what he thinks and then we’ll let you know what we decide.”
“Should I call the clients? Perhaps try to apologize?”
“I think you should do nothing for now. I said that Barney and I will discuss it. But if something like this ever happens again…” He leaned forward, turning on his desk lamp.
“It won’t,” she whispered, still trying to get her bearings. Barney was thinking about making her lead counsel? Why hadn’t he mentioned that to her? In that instant, the phone on the desk rang and Ken picked it up. After announcing his name, he nodded before covering the mouthpiece.
“I’ve got to take this call. We’ll finish our talk at another time.”
The way he said it left no doubt that they’d talk again and Maria rose from her seat, humiliated and panicked. Her thoughts in disarray, she stumbled out of Ken’s office. Passing his secretary, she was grateful that the woman ignored her. When she reached her office, she shut the door and ran through the conversation again. Despite herself, she wondered just how long she would be able to continue working there. Or whether she’d even be given a choice.