Epilogue One
Presley
"I'll accept the proposal under one condition." I look down at him, and I can't help but feel like I've got the whole world now. Like I'm literally floating on cloud nine, but I'm missing one thing to make it even more complete. Calling him my husband. “We get married now."
"You can't get married now." My mother puts her hand on her forehead. “You don't even have a dress."
"I can wear this one.” I look down at the dress I'm wearing now. "I mean, it was a wedding dress. We just altered it."
"But it's pink,” my mother says between clenched teeth.
"Mom, I don't think anyone is going to believe her if she walks down in a white dress.” Clarabella leans in and tells her, “That ship has sailed."
"At least six months ago," Shelby adds in, and in return, my mother just bites down even harder on her teeth.
"I'm down," Bennett agrees. “Although I would like to change my suit."
"I second that,” Shelby says. “You look like cotton candy."
"No, he doesn't." I look down at him. “You look handsome."
"Well, he can look even more handsome,” Clarabella suggests, “in the black tux that I brought for him." We just look at her. “Please, this isn't our first rodeo."
"Okay, great," I say, clapping my hands. “Let's get me married."
"So is that a yes to marrying me?" Bennett asks, and I see he's still on one knee.
"Of course." I grab his face and bend down. “Yes, yes, yes," I say, kissing his lips. “Always yes." I smile, and I wipe the lip gloss off his lips. “I was supposed to propose to you."
"Over my dead body," he jokes, getting up now and kissing me. “Now, how fast can we get married?"
"Thirty minutes,” Shelby says. “We have the venue in the other room already set up.”
I look at her shocked. “Isn’t that for the wedding we are having this weekend?"
"That's what we told you,” Clarabella says. “Now are we still one- hundred percent down with this dress?”
I look down at the dress and nod my head. “It’s pretty and sassy.” I look down. “It’s me, and I love it.” I smile at Bennett. “And I knew that when I put it on, it was what I wanted to get married in.”
Twenty minutes later, my mother is walking me down the aisle where the wedding goes off without a hitch.
Three months later
"So what did the doctor say?" Clarabella asks me as I sit on the couch in my living room. I'm wearing a blue sundress because nothing else fits me at this point.
"It can happen at any minute," I huff. “I'm a week late at this point. She said that I can go up to fourteen days." I look down at the basketball of my stomach. “I'm going to be really, really mad if you stay in here another seven days." I rub my stomach. “She is exactly where she’s supposed to be."
"Here you go." Bennett hands me the glass of apple juice, and I smile up at him. He bends and kisses my lips.
"Thank you," I say, and he picks up my feet from the couch and sits with them in his lap.
"But what did you guys decide?" Shelby comes over from the kitchen with a plate of fruit for herself as she offers me some. "Like, did you ask how many can be in the room?"
"She said it's the husband and a support person." I repeat what the doctor said. "You guys can fight with Mom."
"Bennett," Clarabella calls out to him. “Do you really want to be in there?" I roll my lips when all he does is look at her like she's out of her mind. “I mean, you've already seen her vagina in detail. Do you want to see it with a human coming out of it?" I close my eyes now, not even willing to picture my own vagina the way she described it.
"I'm one thousand percent sure that I want to watch my child being born," he says, and I open my eyes when I feel wetness between my legs.
I move my legs off Bennett and stand. "I think I peed myself," I say, and my sisters’ eyes fly to the middle of my legs.
"You think?" Clarabella sits up. “There is like water dripping down your leg."
"Oh my God." Shelby all but throws the plate of fruit. “It's happening."
"What's happening?" Bennett sits up and looks down. “It's leaking everywhere."
"It's her water,” Clarabella says, running up the stairs. “I'll get the bag." She walks into our bedroom. “Why does it smell like coconut oil and sex in your room?"
"Eww,” Shelby says. “Did you do anal?"
"What?" I shriek. “Why would you even ask that?"
"I've heard coconut oil helps make things easy,” Shelby says, and I look over at Bennett, who is standing there in shock with his fist right in front of his mouth.
"I don't want to touch anything in this room," Clarabella declares, coming out. “I need to, I don't know, like bleach my whole body." She dumps my hospital bag by my feet. “Shit, the baby bag?" She runs up the stairs and stops. “Why the hell are you guys even having sex?" She holds the railing, looking at us.
"The doctor said it could help," Bennett says in his defense.
"You had sex this morning,” Shelby accuses, and I look at her. “And then went to see the doctor with your vag full of sperm." She fake vomits. “What is wrong with you?" She looks from me to Bennett, who puts his hands on his head. “I'm telling Mom."
I'm about to say something to her when a sharp pain rips through me, and I scream, holding the couch. “What the fuck was that?" I pant out. “I'm dying." I put my hand on my stomach.
"Let's get you in the car." Bennett keeps calm while Shelby grabs my bag, and Clarabella finally returns with the baby bag.
I take a couple of steps before I have to stop again. “Aggggghhhh," I groan, grabbing my stomach. “I'm sorry, but this is not what it said in the book." I look at Bennett, who is just trying to get me into the car. He holds my elbow as he walks with me. “That felt like someone stabbed me with a knife."
"We will get you to the hospital," Bennett assures me as we all pile in the car.
"Someone is going to have to time the contractions," Bennett orders as he pulls out of the driveway.
"On it,” Shelby says, taking out her phone. "Just let me know."
I look over at her, and another one comes. “Now," I say right before more water pours out of me. "Oh my God." I look down. “It's like I'm sitting in a puddle of water."
The window in the back is pulled down, and Clarabella sticks her head out. “I'm going to be sick." The wind blows her hair back. "You need to sell the car. Who is going to sit in her vagina juice?"
"Oh my God," I say, looking down. “How much water is in me?" I look at Bennett, who, at this point, has turned a pale white. “Here comes another one." I start my breathing. “That wasn't so bad." I look back at Shelby. “How much time between?"
"What?” she asks and looks down at the phone in her hand. “I forgot to press the button."
"Oh my God!" I yell out.
"It's not my fault." Shelby starts puffing out. “I have her in the back with her head sticking out of the car like a dog. I have you in the front leaking I don't even know what." She puts her hand to her head. “I think I'm going to faint."
"It doesn't matter. We are here now," Bennett states as he pulls into the parking lot at the hospital. He parks the car. “Fuck," he says, looking at me. “I didn't call the doctor."
"Well, I'm sure someone will call her,” Shelby says, opening the door and grabbing the bags.
Clarabella gets out of the car and opens the door for me. “Let me help you." She holds out her hand, and I grab it, putting one foot out and then the other. I stand and drip all over. Clarabella looks down at the water on her feet. “It's fine," she says. “It's not fine. It's not fine." She lets go of my hand. “I don't volunteer as tribute." She shakes her head. “I don't even want to be in there. I'm out."
"Oh, would you stop it." Shelby pushes her to the side and hands her the bag. “Can we get her inside?"
But Bennett has me by the hand, and we are already walking inside. "Of all days for your water to break, you think it's a good idea to do it with your sisters here," he mumbles as he presses the button to the elevator.
"You think I planned this?" I look at him. “This is not like it was supposed to go," I remind him, right before the biggest contraction of my life runs through me. I literally have to bend over. “Oh my God," I pant as I get into the elevator with my sisters.
"What floor?" Shelby asks me, and I just look at her. "Oh, for the love of God," she hisses and steps out of the elevator, stopping the first person she sees. “Maternity?"
"Eighth floor," the man says, and Shelby turns, rushing back into the elevator and pressing eight five million times.
"Thank God you pressed it that many times. It makes the elevator go faster,” Clarabella deadpans and looks at me. “She's leaking all over the elevator." She turns and puts her forehead against the wall of the elevator. "Should I press the emergency button and be like cleanup on aisle eight?" she mimics, and if I wasn't in so much pain, I might even laugh.
The elevator doors open, and I waddle out, walking to the desk. “Hi," Bennett says. “My wife is having a baby."
"Obviously, she's having a baby. Why else would you be here?" Shelby says.
"She's leaking everywhere,” Clarabella points out. “Like, she must have zero water left inside her."
The nurse looks at all of us, and I try to say something, but all I can do is hold the desk in front of me. “She's in active labor."
"She's doing something,” Clarabella says. “We tried timing stuff but..."
"Right this way," the nurse says, and I try to follow her, but I have to stop, and she runs to get a wheelchair.
"You should put a towel on that,” Clarabella urges, but I just sit, and it hurts my butt.
"I feel pressure," I tell the nurse who rushes into the room.
"What else do you feel?” she asks. “Please get into the bed."
"I feel like someone is trying to get out of my vagina," I tell her. “Like, literally crawl out of me like a Transformer."
"Oh, good God," Bennett says as he helps me get into the bed, but a pain rips through me, and all I can do is put my elbows on the bed as I rock from side to side.
"When did this all start?" she asks, and I look at my sisters.
"I don't know,” Shelby says. “We were sitting down. They had just come home from the doctor."
"Did she tear your membranes?" the nurse asks me, and I just stare at her. “Okay, let’s see what's going on," she says, and I open my legs.
"Is that blood?" Bennett asks as I try to look down there, but with my stomach, I can't see shit. He comes over to my side and holds my hand. “It's okay."
"What is it?" I look at Shelby, who has her hands on her cheeks. “Is it bad?"
"Could be the mucus plug," the nurse explains.
"I'm never, ever having a child,” Clarabella declares as she puts a hand to her mouth. “I can't do it."
The nurse cuts off my panties, and she gasps. “Oh, my, she's crowning," she says, and I have no idea what that means. She springs up and runs over to the monitor. "We have a crowning in room seven," the nurse says, looking at me. “We need a heated bed and a doctor STAT."
"What can we do to help?" Shelby asks, looking around.
"Go keep mom calm," the nurse says, motioning to me with her chin. "Whatever you do, don't push."
"Don't push?" I yell out. “I need drugs." I look at her. “It's in my birth plan. I'm not doing this without drugs."
"Oh, we are way past that," she announces, and she runs out of the room.
"I have a couple of Xanax," Clarabella says, going for her purse. "If you chew them, they might kick in, and you'll be asleep before you remember any of this."
"Okay, people." A man comes in clapping his hands, followed by four other people with a bed, and I don't even know what.
"Cover her," Shelby tells Bennett.
"He's the doctor," Bennett says. “He's going to see a lot more than that.”
"Okay, we need to get her undressed," the nurse says.
"Just cut it off,” Clarabella says, and I just stare at her. "Like, you are never going to wear this dress again. It's got bodily fluid on it and mucus and all that stuff."
I'm about to yell at her when a sharp pain comes. “Oh my God!” I yell when the burning fills my vagina. It's like a pot of hot water is being thrown up in my vagina. “It burns."
"What is that?" Clarabella asks, standing next to the doctor looking straight at my vagina. "Why is it red?" She looks at me. “Why is it so puffy?"
"Okay, so we are going to start to push the next time a contraction comes,” the doctor explains. “We are all going to count to ten." I feel the pain coming, the tightness starts right away, and I groan. “Okay, and push,” the doctor says, and I push as they count.
"Oh my God, the head is coming,” Clarabella says, leaning next to the doctor's head and all he can do is smile at her. “It's a girl," she informs him, and I don’t have any time to say anything while another one starts to come.
"Okay, I want you to push like you have to take a big poop," the nurse tells me. “And go."
"You can do this," Bennett soothes from beside me, kissing my forehead.
"I didn't think your vagina could get bigger,” Clarabella says. “I was wrong."
"Damn,” Shelby says when she looks down, and Bennett is about to go and look, and I squeeze his hand.
"Don't you dare," I warn between clenched teeth.
"Don't do it, bro,” Clarabella agrees. “You'll never look at it the same." She shakes her head and looks away.
"Push,” the doctor says, and I push with everything that I have. My eyes close as I hear them count.
"Oh my God, the whole head is out,” Clarabella says, and she puts her hand on her head. “It's like a human head is coming out of her."
"Don't push,” the doctor says, and I don't have to guess what he's doing because Clarabella tells me.
"He's literally turning the baby's head," she says between clenched teeth. “Is that safe?" She looks at the doctor, who just laughs at her.
"This is the most fun I've ever had,” the doctor says, laughing. "Okay, I think one more push, and we are going to have the shoulders out, and then it should be smooth sailing."
"I don't know if I can do that," I say, getting suddenly so tired. “It hurts."
"You got this," Bennett coaches, and I take a big breath in. “If anyone can do this, you can."
"You got this,” Shelby encourages from beside me.
"I have faith in you," Clarabella says. “I mean, at this point, you're a hero."
The nurse puts a blanket on my stomach when I bear down, and when we get to seven, the doctor looks at me. “Here we go," he says, and I don't know what he means, but one second later, he's placing my baby on my stomach. “We have a baby," he says, but my arms are already around her as the sobs rip through me.
"My baby," I say, looking down at her with Bennett's head next to mine. “We have a baby," I tell him, and he's got his own tears running down his face. "Hi, honey," I say, kissing the baby as she blinks her eyes at us. "Welcome to the world, baby girl."