18

Chapter 18

Chapter Sixteen


Chapter Sixteen

SHE was crying, and not simple tears. Not with mere guilt. Every sob

sounded as if it ripped a new piece of her heart out, as if every dream she‟d

ever had had been crushed forever.

Luc‟s stomach crashed to his toes.

“Sugar,” he implored with a soft knock. “Open the door. I‟m so sorry. I

lost my temper. I didn‟t mean to scare you.”

No response, just more of the rending cries that clawed his gut with

fear and regret. Feeling two inches tall, he leaned against the door, hands

pressed to it, wishing like hell that he could reach through and comfort her.

How could a few inches of wood separate them so completely, as if a

continent of pain and regret stood between them?

“Talk to me, Alyssa.”

Under the door‟s crack, he saw her sitting on the floor, huddled, and

ran a frustrated hand down his face. What the hell had he done?

Jack‟s lifestyle wasn‟t his. Luc had never felt the need to tie up a

woman, especially in anger. Whatever she might have done with Tyler,

Alyssa had been hurt before. Raped. The terror on her face, the flashback

to her past, had been a bitter slap of a reminder for Luc. The fact she could

even mentally put him in the same category as the man who hurt her was

the worst sort of pain. He felt like a thoughtless snake. Damn it.

“Sugar, please. I won‟t hurt you. I won‟t touch you. Just come out so

we can talk.”

Silence. Then a sniffle and a shuffle. She got to her feet. His heart

leapt, and hope seized him that she would open the door, hear him out.

This time, he‟d listen to her explanation about her time with Tyler. Even if it

was exactly what he thought it was, he doubted Alyssa meant to hurt him.

She had no idea he loved her. Maybe he should confess. Maybe they could

talk through their problems and salvage everything.

Instead of removing the barrier between them, she walked away and

started the shower.

He knocked again. No answer.

233

Shayla Black

Long minutes passed. The spray of water was loud . . . but not enough

to drown out the continued sobs that split the air and tore at his heart.

Calling to her wasn‟t doing any good, and all this crying couldn‟t be

good for her or the baby. Her home had been viciously invaded and she‟d

been scared out of her mind both by an intruder and her own husband. He

had to focus on that, had to reach her and persuade her to let him help.

Another jagged cry sounded over the water. God, she could hardly

catch a breath. The sobs were coming faster now, each sounding more

wrenching than the last. Luc couldn‟t take it anymore.

Thanking God for Deke‟s insistence that he know forms o f selfdefense, including martial arts, Luc gathered his energy, centered it, then

kicked the bathroom door. With a crash and a splintering of wood, it gave

in.

Behind the shower curtain, she gasped as the door lurched on its

hinges and crashed against the wall.

Once inside, Luc didn‟t hesitate. He yanked back the shower curtain.

Inside, Alyssa sat on the shower bench under scalding water, steam rising

around her. She‟d curled her knees up to her chest, her teeth chattering

viciously. She looked up at him with haunted blue eyes, mascara running

down her face.

The sight kicked him in the stomach.

Swallowing his nerves, he climbed into the shower, clothes, shoes,

and all. Hot water pelted him, plastering his hair to his shoulders and neck.

He barely noticed. Instead, he lifted his wife into his arms. Thank God, she

went without a fight.

Luc sat on the shower bench and set Alyssa in his lap. “I‟m so sorry.”

She closed her eyes, stiffened. “I came home a little after four this

morning to find the house had been broken into, called nine-one-one and

Tyler. I didn‟t call you. It was two in the morning in Los Angeles. There was

nothing you could do.”

Her monotone voice sounded dead. Luc ached all over again for her.

“I‟m listening.”

“Tyler examined the crime scene before Remy got there. While Tyler

was looking around, I got sick, passed out.”

“What?” Luc tightened his arms around her.

234

Shayla Black

“The paint fumes and perfume and shock, I guess. When I came to, I

was in Tyler‟s car and he was taking me to the emergency room. I told him

I didn‟t need to go. I just needed sleep.”

“Did he take you anyway?” Luc asked hopefully.

Alyssa shook her head. “I pleaded. He insisted that I eat something,

and he can‟t cook. So we went to that egg place not far from the club. After

I‟d eaten, I started cramping.”

“Like you‟d eaten something bad? It usually takes longer for food—”

“No. Like menstrual cramps.”

Luc‟s heart came to a screeching halt. “What?”

“I went to the restaurant‟s bathroom.” She began sobbing again, nearly

uncontrollably.

He curled her against his chest and kissed her forehead. “Please, take

a deep breath. This isn‟t good for you.”

Finally, she managed to breathe deeply; then she swallowed back

tears. “I found blood.”

Oh, Jesus Christ. His stomach went into a free fall. “Did you go to the

emergency room?”

Again, she shook her head. “I was afraid we‟d have to wait too long. I

called my new obstetrician. She agreed to meet me at her office before

hours, so Tyler took me there, waited while the doctor examined me.”

And he‟d missed all of this. Luc stroked her shoulder, pressed another

kiss to her forehead. Not only had he missed it; he‟d heaped more shit on

her.

Why the fuck hadn‟t he listened instead of letting his jealousy do the

talking?

“Are you okay?” Luc was almost afraid to ask the question. “What did

she say?”

“That it‟s not uncommon to spot if you‟re on your feet too much or

under too much stress.”

Without a doubt, Alyssa suffered from both.

“The baby is okay. But she told me to rest. Sleep. I couldn‟t come

here, and Tyler wanted me somewhere he could protect me. So he offered

me his place to crash, but when we got there, I was too keyed up and

couldn‟t sleep. I didn‟t want to worry you. You were so far away. I was too

235

Shayla Black

shaken to realize you might be worried. I‟m not used to having anyone care

. . .”

“Sugar, anywhere, anytime, anyplace, you call me.” Luc wanted to

growl the words at her. She was so damn independent, and it had probably

grated her to even ask Tyler for help, much less call someone halfway

across the country.

“Anyway, Tyler called the doctor again, asked if there was anything

she could give me. Though she normally wouldn‟t do this for someone

pregnant, she prescribed me a sedative because of my stress and fatigue.”

“And you fell asleep.” In Tyler’s bed.

She nodded. “I know I should have called. Everything happened so

fast.”

Of course she‟d been more worried about making sure the baby was

okay than soothing his jangled nerves. It wasn‟t her fault he was a jealous,

distrusting bastard.

“I‟m so sorry you went through all of that without me. That someone

broke in the house. That you spotted. That I scared you.” He held her

close.

The water began to cool, and Luc reached out to turn it off. Leaning

out of the tub, he grabbed her towel off the bar and wrapped it around her

small frame, dabbing it across her face and removing the mascara,

squeezing the long strands of her hair inside its folds.

She stood docile, almost unmoving. It wasn‟t like her, and he worried

until it was a bleeding hole in his chest.

Quickly, he threw off his wet clothes and left them in the bottom of the

shower, then reached for his towel. He didn‟t bother drying, and his hair

dripped thick streams of water down his back and shoulders. Instead, he

wrapped the towel around his waist and helped her out of the shower.

Alyssa didn‟t say a word as he steadied her over to the bed. On the

way, he grabbed their robes from the back of the door. He helped her into

hers, belting it for her as if she were a child, then shrugged into his own. In

silence, he toweled more moisture from her hair and studied her face. He

still didn‟t like her expression. Somewhere past shock, it was almost blank.

Luc swallowed down his frustration. Whatever was going on with her

was more than someone breaking into the house, more than the fact he‟d

236

Shayla Black

been angry enough to tie her to the bed. And he had to get her to open up,

let it go, if he could.

He pulled her into his lap, gratified that she went trustingly, resting her

head on his shoulder. “Alyssa, sugar. Tell me why I scared you.”

Her head jerked, jolted, until it finally became a full-blown shake. “It‟s

nothing.”

“Please.” He grabbed her tighter, then forced himself to let go, afraid

he‟d scare her all over again. “Someone hurt you.”

She closed her eyes. A tear ran down her cheek.

It nearly killed him. “Someone raped you. I did something to remind

you of that, right?”

“It was a long time ago. Just forget it. I have.”

Luc barely heard her whisper, but he knew it was a lie. She wasn‟t

over it, and hearing the chocked admission heaped in denial crushed him.

“You were a teenager.”

For a long minute, Alyssa said nothing, but stared at the wall on his

right. Finally, she murmured, “Fifteen.”

Dear God. Not even old enough to drive. Barely more than a girl, and

some asshole had forced his way into her body against her will? Rape was

one of the ugliest of crimes, but against one so young?

Stomach turning, Luc hesitated. He had to keep asking questions that

would allow her to reveal the ordeal a bit at a time. She wasn‟t ready to just

spill her entire secret in one breath.

“Were you on a date?”

Her whole body tensed. “No.” Then she gave a hysterical sob. “I

wasn‟t allowed to date. My mother expected me to be a virgin when I got

married.”

He wasn‟t sure he wanted to hear this, truly. But he had to. Without

this knowledge, Luc sensed that he couldn‟t truly understand his wife.

“And you were a virgin when this . . . ?” He tensed, swallowed,

somehow hoping like hell she‟d say no.

But she nodded.

Luc had never been nauseous and angry at once. He wanted to

smash this bastard‟s head, make him feel every bit of the pain Alyssa had

237

Shayla Black

clearly felt. But he kept it to himself. No sudden movements, no swearing,

no making fists. Instead, he softly stroked her hair.

“A boy from school?” he ventured, his voice as gentle as he could

make it.

Alyssa opened her mouth, then closed it. Hesitated. Then she rose to

her feet. Luc wanted to keep her in his lap, safe and warm, where he could

hold her and soothe her at the slightest tremor. But he didn‟t dare hold her

down again.

She paced to the bathroom counter and braced herself on it. “Not . . .

exactly. It‟s ancient history. Not really important.”

Luc stood and slowly, giving her plenty of time to back away,

approached her. Relief poured through his system when she didn‟t pull

away, so he loosely placed his hands on her shoulders.

“I think it‟s very important. If you don‟t want to tell me, I understand. I

haven‟t done a good job earning your trust today. Or for the past two

months. I‟ve been slow to learn, but I want to do better—with your help.

Please, I need to know what‟s going to frighten you so I don‟t do it again.”

Alyssa bit her lip, sighed, looked at the ceiling as if praying for

strength. “N-no bondage. I can‟t . . .” She shivered, wrapping her arms

around herself. “I just can‟t.”

Reality hit Luc in the face. What had Jack said? He and Alyssa had

realized quickly they weren‟t compatible. That made complete sense now.

“Not unless you‟re ready. If that day never comes, I‟ll understand.”

She gave him a jerky nod. “Thank you.”

Caressing her shoulders, Luc brought her against his body. She

wanted to leave the story there. She‟d been fifteen, a virgin, and had been

raped. But he sensed the story was only beginning.

“It wasn‟t a boy from school who hurt you?”

Alyssa wrapped her arms around her middle and shook her head. “I—I

don‟t know if I can talk about this. I haven‟t told anyone this since the night

after it happened.”

She‟d kept this to herself for fourteen years? “You never told Jack?

Tyler? A therapist?”

A sad smile crossed her face before it dissolved. “Jack would have

hunted him down, and that‟s the last thing I want. Tyler . . . If I think my past

238

Shayla Black

is coming back to haunt me, I‟ll tell him. Never could afford a therapist until

I worked through a lot of this on my own.”

Why the hell wouldn‟t she want Jack to hunt this asshole down?

Personally, Luc was dying to. But she didn‟t want to hear that, and he

couldn‟t jeopardize the conversation now that she was talking.

He hugged her back to his chest again. “Who did this to you, sugar?”

“Joshua.” She shuddered, closed her eyes. “He‟s m-my stepbrother.”

Sick fury assailed him once again. Someone who was supposedly a

part of her blended family had violated her trust and body? As much as

hearing this killed him, he had to get the full story. But he didn‟t know what

questions to ask from here.

Swallowing, he decided to simply wing it. “Your mother remarried?”

She nodded slowly. “When I was twelve.”

Please, please tell me this creep didn’t start taking advantage of her

then. “Did it start then? Touching? Fondling?”

“No. At first, he was my best friend. My mom remarried someone very

wealthy. We moved from our middle-class neighborhood to . . . Lifestyles of

the Rich and Famous. I started a new school. I didn‟t know anyone. I was

shy. I had a hard time adjusting.”

And this prick Joshua had used her insecurity against her. “So he said

he‟d be your friend?”

“Yes, and he made sure I had all the coolest friends in school. And he

kept other guys away from me. When I was a freshman, there was a

junior—one of Josh‟s classmates—who decided he wanted to nail me at a

party. He got me drunk and cornered me in the bathroom. Joshua and

some of his other friends picked the lock and stormed in. Joshua beat this

guy ruthlessly; then he carried me out. The next Monday, he told everyone

we were dating and not to fuck with me. I thought he did it for my

protection.” She grunted in disbelief.

“He wanted you for himself.” Luc had no trouble picturing that.

“Yeah. He‟d fly into a rage if he even thought anyone was looking at

me, or if he suspected I liked someone. Shortly after that incident, he

started sneaking into my room, said he wanted to make sure I was safe.”

239

Shayla Black

When she laughed bitterly, it twisted his stomach. Safe? The asshole

had taken total advantage of her. How could he couch that as protecting

her? “Did he start kissing you or just attack?”

“Oh, there were kisses. Lots and lots of those, and I stupidly

encouraged it, thinking that he really cared. That started when I was

fourteen.”

And this fucking rapist had been . . . what? Sixteen? Seventeen? Old

enough to know that he was using a young, innocent girl.

“When did he start touching you?”

“Right before I turned fifteen. That summer.”

The way she sighed raggedly told Luc she needed to pause. He stood

silently behind her, caressing her arms. It was on the tip of his tongue to tell

her they could stop here, talk later. Certainly, it would be better for his

stomach and temper. But he knew getting her back to this place would be

difficult and painful. Better to get it all out now.

“When did it become more?”

“I found out that he‟d been sleeping with this girl in his English class. I

was . . . so stupid that I ever believed that he wanted to marry me

someday. In my fairy-tale-minded head, I thought he was waiting for me.

You know, to grow up, so our first experience could be together. He told me

that of course he had to fuck other girls. Our parents couldn‟t know about

us yet. They‟d have freaked. So Joshua said he was keeping up

appearances, letting his dad know he had a healthy interest in other

females.”

“Scumbag,” Luc muttered. That was actually a lot milder than what he

was thinking, but with that pronouncement, she‟d know he empathized but

wouldn‟t alarm her with the violence of his fury.

“Then he said that all the waiting for me had been tough on him and

that he‟d had to have other pussy or his human pressure valves got too

tight.” She scoffed. “So I told him to go away, that I didn‟t want him

anymore. I stopped speaking to him for weeks.”

“And he turned violent?”

“Yes. Just after my sophomore year started, he came to my room one

night, tied me down, and said he felt cheated that he‟d waited around and

hadn‟t gotten any. And he‟d so been looking forward to being my first. He‟d

240

Shayla Black

even gone so far as to plan this elaborate scheme to „pop my cherry‟ for my

sweet sixteen.”

Luc‟s nausea rose to new levels, as did his need to wipe this asshole

off the face of the earth. He wasn‟t a violent man, but this . . . Unforgivable.

“I‟m sorry.” He wanted to say so much more, but at this point, words

would only placate him. Her damage had been done. He only hoped he

could help heal her.

“Oh, God it hurt . . .” Her body trembled, seized up. The sobs started

again. “H-he took me every way a man can take a woman.”

Joshua had raped her anally, too? Another blow to the restraint around

Luc‟s rage. He grabbed the countertop on either side of her hips and

looked at her bowed head in the mirror. Her haunted eyes, squeezed shut

tight, dominated her tense, fragile face.

“Sugar, I‟m so sorry.” He kissed the back of her head. He didn‟t trust

himself to touch her gently in that moment. Too many violent urges running

through his body.

“Wh-when it was over, I was sobbing and bleeding. He was angry and

said he wondered why he‟d bothered. I was just another whore after all.”

Fists clenched, she drew in a shuddering breath. “I . . . I wanted to kill him.”

Luc understood that feeling well.

“In retrospect, I shouldn‟t have been surprised by Joshua‟s behavior.

All the signs were there.”

“My God, you shouldn‟t have had to know the signs at that age. You

told your parents, right?”

Her body wilted then, as if she had no more fight. “I told my mother.”

Biting back the urge to prompt her, Luc waited while she closed her

eyes, gathered her courage.

“She didn‟t believe me.”

“What the hell? Certainly she could see . . . There was evidence.”

Alyssa shook her head. “I was stupid. I panicked and cleaned up.

Today, I‟d have marched myself down to the hospital and demanded a rape

kit and prosecuted the son of a bitch. But at fifteen, all I could think about

was „getting caught.‟

241

Shayla Black

“The day after it happened, Joshua was vile to me at school, told

everyone he‟d nailed me. He called me his convenient pussy and said he

was going to get more that night. I was terrified.”

Just when Luc thought this prick couldn‟t get any lower, Alyssa

revealed another fact about her stepbrother that enraged him all over

again.

“So after dinner, I pulled my mom aside and told her what had

happened. She accused me of trying to ruin her life. I was just being

petulant because Joshua liked girls his age and lying because I resented

her happiness.” Alyssa sniffed, pressed her lips together.

Having your own mother stab you in the back the day after suffering

the worst physical and emotional trauma of your life? Luc couldn‟t even

imagine the anguish . . . And knowing that Alyssa had never resolved this

between her and her mother? No wonder the woman‟s death had been

confusing for her.

“Your mother‟s betrayal hurt worst of all.” It wasn‟t a question; he

knew.

She stared at the marble countertop and nodded.

“It‟s not your fault; none of this was. Your mother should have stood

beside you. She was supposed to protect you. I understand why you both

loved and hated her.”

Alyssa whipped her gaze over her shoulder, clearly surprised that he‟d

figured that out. “Yeah. But after she married Richard, she became a

different person. Absorbed in him. And I knew he‟d be no help. Joshua

could do no wrong in his eyes. He probably would have applauded his

son‟s behavior. He was a misogynist who objectified all women.”

And Joshua followed in his father‟s footsteps.

Luc didn‟t understand either the point of view or the horrific lapse in

parenting. But he could tell from Alyssa‟s demeanor that she still had more

to tell.

“After I talked to my mom, it was late. Near bedtime. I knew Joshua

would come to my room again. I asked to spend the night at a friend‟s

house, but Mom said no. I packed a bag, took the hundred bucks I had in a

drawer, and snuck out my window.”

“Oh, dear God. Where did you go?”

242

Shayla Black

“At first to a friend‟s house, but when my mom called in the middle of

the night looking for me, saying I‟d run away, her parents drove me home

and told me not to come back. My stepfather had apparently threatened

them with criminal and civil action. He was a big-time lawyer.

“I went home that night. My mom grounded me and sent me to my

room. The only saving grace was that everyone was awake, and Joshua

couldn‟t sneak into my room. The next day, instead of going to school, I ran

away again. This time, I made it as far as Hollywood.”

Horror zipped through Luc. “Did you know anyone there?”

She shook her head. “It was only a couple dozen miles from home, but

it might as well have been a world away.”

A fifteen-year-old girl in Hollywood? Alone? She would have been

preyed upon, unable to support herself unless—Luc didn‟t even want to

consider how she‟d eaten and kept a roof over her head.

“You looked for a job,” he guessed.

“Fast-food places wouldn‟t hire me until I was sixteen, and even then, I

had to have parental consent. Sixteen was still nine months away, and

even if I could ask my parents, they would never have approved.” Alyssa

gripped the counter tighter. “You can guess what happened next.”

Oh, no. That couldn’t be. “Sugar . . .”

She bit her lip, then spoke quickly, without inflection. “The first few

times were hard. I closed my eyes a lot and pretended I was someplace

else. Thank God none of the men were creepy or dangerous. Just run-ofthe-mill johns looking to get laid.”

Luc was speechless. Fifteen and reduced to prostitution because her

family had hurt her in every way possible. Forced to fend for herself

because they were too selfish and had all but abandoned her.

A million things clicked into place: the reason she was so touchy about

people assuming she was a whore, the reason she insisted that the girls

who work for her better themselves, the reason she hated to rely on others

unless forced, the reason she wasn‟t wound up about being nude in public.

She‟d learned early that her body was a commodity and that only educating

herself would improve her lot. She‟d clearly also figured out that her selfworth had nothing to do with her career, but her inner core.

243

Shayla Black

In his head, Luc thought he‟d known that her “profession” hadn‟t fazed

her . . . but he hadn‟t behaved that way. It had been a big deal to him. Now it seemed so stupid. He‟d bite his tongue off before he ever said anything

that made her feel like less than a lady again.

“Did you ever go home?” he asked quietly.

“I thought about it. The first Christmas without family was hard. I spent

it alone in an alley with a candy bar and a campfire, hoping that no one

would attack me in my sleep. But the week before, I‟d seen Joshua. He

came looking for me, flashing my picture around and telling all the other

girls that my mom wanted me back for the holidays. Most protected me and

played dumb, but one of the older women thought she could „save‟ me by

snitching. I got away with, maybe, three minutes to spare.”

“And since Joshua knew where you were, you couldn‟t stay.”

“I had some money saved up. I bought a bus ticket, told the woman

behind the counter I wanted to go someplace warm. Joshua always made

fun of Southerners, called them stupid rednecks. So I thought heading to

the South would be a good idea.”

She shrugged. “Bus ticket brought me here. A woman I talked to for

part of the trip promised that stripping was better and nearly as lucrative as

. . .” She blew out a breath. “I got a fake ID with a fake name to blend in.”

“Alyssa isn‟t your name?” She was so Alyssa to Luc. He couldn‟t

imagine calling her something else.

“It‟s my middle name. My real name is Lindsey.”

It didn‟t suit her at all. Lindsey was a girl. This woman before him was

tough, a survivor, worthy of a name with a big, sexy sound like Alyssa. She

astounded Luc with her strength, her resilience, her never-say-die attitude.

She‟d walked through hell and fire, and emerged on the other side a

woman of steel. As much as he ached for what she‟d endured, he was

proud of her.

“Then I knocked on Sexy Sirens‟ door,” she said. “It was called

something else then, but Marquessa, while a bitch, saved my life. She let

me live at the club until I got on my feet, worked around my school

schedule when I started studying for my GED. Her boys kept the locals

from hitting on me too much. I kinda . . . grew up there.” She shrugged. “I

never went home again until my mother‟s funeral. I saw Joshua—from a

244

Shayla Black

distance. He didn‟t see me, thank God. And to this day, he still doesn‟t

know what became of me. If he had any clue, I don‟t know what he would

do.”

Luc knew what he‟d like to do to the asshole, but Alyssa needed his

understanding and comfort now, not his fury. He‟d look up this prick soon

and take him down a peg or twenty, but this moment was about his wife.

Guilt crept in that his behavior had caused her grief and forced her to

spill her secrets to him. On the other hand, getting her story out in the

open, him hearing it, was perhaps one of the best things that could have

happened to them.

“I‟m so sorry I upset you. Accused you. Scared you.”

And let Tyler’s smug face dig under my skin when he answered the

door. In retrospect, Luc knew her bouncer/bodyguard was in love with her

and probably enjoyed watching him draw the worst conclusions, driving a

wedge into Alyssa‟s new marriage. He didn‟t respect the guy for it . . . but

he understood.

She bowed her head. “The funny thing about you accusing me of

sleeping around? Until you, I never really enjoyed sex. I mean, at first it did

nothing but bring up bad memories. When I got older and figured out that it

wasn‟t my fault and Joshua was nothing but slime, I tried to date, tried to

have sex. It just always seemed . . . uncomfortable and embarrassing. You

actually cared about my experience.” She grimaced. “Until you, I never had

an orgasm that wasn‟t solo. Until you, I never understood how sex

connected people.”

Seriously? Luc was stunned silent. She‟d never enjoyed the lush,

sensual intimacies of sex until him? Then again, how could she with such

terrible memories attached?

And where did Tyler fit into this picture? Had she slept with him as

some form of payment? No, she wouldn‟t do that anymore. So, had Tyler

been an experiment? Clearly, she trusted the man or she wouldn‟t have

taken a sleeping pill and fallen into his bed. Did some part of her love the

bouncer? Luc didn‟t know. He did know that, despite her protestations that she‟d never had sex with the man, Tyler had to have fathered Alyssa‟s

coming child.

Whatever reason she had for denying that fact they‟d tackle later.

245

Shayla Black

Luc wrapped his arms around his wife, who relaxed against him,

leaning back into his body. Safe, treasured, his. At least in part. At least for now.

He still had to figure out who was terrorizing her. For a while, he‟d

assumed it was Tyler, but . . . the man had had a thousand opportunities to

hurt Alyssa today. Instead, he‟d taken her to the doctor, given up his own

bed. Granted, he hadn‟t called her husband, but since he wanted her for

himself, why would he?

Peter had been in the county jail when the house had been broken

into. Who did that leave? Primpton? Had the threatening vandalism been

his work? Or someone else entirely?

Clutching his wife, Luc lifted Alyssa against him, carrying her to the

bed. He set her gently on the sheets. “Rest.”

She grabbed his arms. “Stay with me.”

Hope surged. The fact she wanted him near her was a good sign.

With a nod, Luc lowered himself to the bed, stretching out beside her,

stroking her damp hair.

Their gazes met. Telling this story had stripped her soul down to its

core and left her bare. Every bit of that pain and fear was in her blue eyes.

He ached to make all that go away.

“Luc?” Alyssa breathed, her platinum hair floating around her

shoulders like a temptress. But looking at her sweet oval face, rosy cheeks,

and swollen, impossibly blue eyes only reminded him of the girl with the

scarred heart that lay underneath that temptress.

“I‟m here. Always here for you,” he vowed.

“Touch me. Please.” She shook as she unbelted her robe. “Be with me

. . .”

Her request shocked him. He wanted to, God knew. Her words filled

him with joy, made his cock weep with need. But . . . “Sugar, you‟ve been

through a lot tonight. I don‟t think now is the best time—”

“It is.” She shrugged her robe off, revealing every bit of her gorgeous

golden skin. “I have to replace the memories of Joshua with something

wonderful. With you.”

How could he say no to wiping away her worst memories? How could

he fight something he wanted so damn badly?

246

Shayla Black

Luc rose up on all fours over her, giving her plenty of space to move if

she needed, and kissed her belly. “Are you sure?”

Alyssa reached up, curled her arms around his neck, and brought his

mouth down to hers for a lingering, desperate kiss that pleaded.

Unnecessary. She‟d had him at “Touch me. ”

“Completely sure.”

Luc tore off his robe and lowered himself over her, cradling himself

between her thighs, taking hold of her hips. He rained kisses over her

cheeks, her neck, the swells of her breasts, and she softened in his arms.

For long minutes, he brushed his palms over her skin, and finally, she

sighed.

Needing to know she was ready for him, Luc reached between them

and massaged her clit. She drew in a sweet, shuddering breath, and desire

gripped him mercilessly.

Cock in hand, he aligned their bodies. “Tell me if I hurt you. Scare you.

I never want to do that again.”

She swallowed, her solemn blue gaze fastened on him, and Luc felt

her pain and need slice clear through to his heart. “I will, but you won‟t. Just

. . . be with me.”

The fact she wanted him anywhere near her now made him feel

honored. She‟d given him a gift. And he intended to treasure it—and her.

She linked their fingers together. The connection was electric and

shuddered down his spine. Alyssa‟s desire to be closer to him touched him

deep, stripping away his anger. Having her ask for him, surrender to him,

was so much sweeter than tying her to the bed like a caveman. He‟d regret

that forever and hoped to make it up to her now.

Slowly, Luc began to push inside her. He stopped, retreated, eased in

again—a soft glide, a slow dance. As always, she burned him. Luc

squeezed his eyes shut, focusing on making this tender for her, making this

good.

With every inch he submerged into the scalding clasp of her body, she

seared him, especially when Alyssa braced her feet on the mattress and

raised her hips up to meet him.

“Luc. Yes! ”

247

Shayla Black

Damn it. With two words, she nearly unraveled his self-control. She felt

so good that it hurt, boiled his blood. As need rocketed, he began to sweat.

Luc tried to breathe deep, re-engage his brain. But he needed her touch,

needed to know that despite all that had happened today, she was still his.

Luc drew back, then thrust forward to the hilt. “You feel so perfect

around me. I want to make you feel good, too.”

Alyssa didn‟t reply, just pressed her mouth to his for a slow, blistering

kiss. He tasted her need, her healing. As difficult as hearing about Joshua

had been for him, Luc would do it a thousand times over if it would ease

her pain and allow her to feel closer to him.

He pulled back, her body clinging to him. Unable to resist her sweet

mouth, he kissed her again, deeper, slower, in rhythm with his thrusts.

Alyssa tightened her arms around his neck.

Luc swallowed as he thrust his fingers into her hair, his thumb tracing

her jaw. Her eyes were closed in impending bliss and she looked beautiful.

“Alyssa,” his whispered, his voice husky.

Slowly, her eyes fluttered open, revealing dilated pupils, and she met

his stare. Satisfaction hummed inside him. Now he knew that she was

utterly aware of who was deep inside her.

His heart jumped as he drove home in one smooth stroke. She

gasped, tightening her slick walls around him.

“Thank you for trusting me with your story,” he whispered. “Your body.”

Alyssa nodded, her gaze never wavering as tears filled her eyes. Her

trust and the exquisite feel of her were denting his self-control. He had to

find the will, make this about healing her, not about stroking his possessive

instinct. Frightening her was the last thing he wanted.

Lowering his hands to her hips, he tilted her toward him and eased into

her again. Pleasure transformed her expression. Her mouth gaped open,

eyes going wide.

“Come for me.”

“Y-yes.”

The catch in her voice drove him deeper inside her. He drowned in her

blue eyes and dark lashes. He didn‟t blink; he didn‟t want to miss a moment

between them.

Suddenly, her body tightened, and she whimpered.

248

Shayla Black

“Luc!” Alyssa dug her nails into his shoulders.

He held the pace steady, sweat beading across his body. Seconds

later she clamped down on him and cried out, releasing. Satisfaction roared

through him as she keened out her pleasure.

His pleasure spiraled nearly beyond his control as her face revealed

her bliss. And trust. She trusted him to care for her. Nothing was more

gorgeous or humbling.

He closed his eyes, trying to get a grip, but need shut down his brain.

Grasping for self-control was a waste of time. And if he was going over, he

wanted to take her with him again.

With that in mind, he plied her with one unrelenting stroke after

another and began to rub her clit.

“Luc!” She could barely find her breath now. “I can‟t—”

“You can. For me.”

In the next moment, she clamped down on him again, her explosion of

pleasure mere moments away. And still something drove him.

“Who‟s deep inside you?” he demanded.

“You are, Luc.”

“That‟s right. Always.” And her body told him she was seconds from

orgasm. “Who is making you come?”

“Luc!”

She bucked and screamed beneath him, and he swore he was even

deeper inside her than before.

Damn, it still wasn‟t enough. But his control was fraying, his body

screaming for release.

As he pushed back inside her swollen sex with a steady, urgent stroke,

Luc could never remember feeling closer to any woman, ever. Alyssa rose

up to meet him. Her stare locked with his. Her growing pleasure and rising

need killed the last of his self-control.

Sweat broke out across his back, his forehead, as he pushed his way

inside her again. Then she was chanting his name and climaxing so hard,

he could barely move. And clinging to him in every way possible. Luc fell

deep into her as the last of his resistance gave way, and he soared into a

pleasure so intense, it rattled his core, then remade him, cementing his

love for her.

249

Shayla Black

Slowly, their breathing recovered, and Luc wrapped her up in his arms,

tangling his legs with hers. In that moment, he felt peace with her. With how

far they‟d come together. He only hoped that all of the difficulty was behind

them.

“Feel better?” he asked softly.

She bit her lip, hesitating. “Do you wish you hadn‟t married me? I

mean, after everything I told you . . .”

“Don‟t ever think that I‟d judge you for what you had to do to survive.

As much as I hate what you went through, I‟m incredibly proud of who

you‟ve become.”

Her smile was as bright as a breaking dawn, and Luc‟s heart broke all

over again.

“Are you going to sell the club?” he whispered.

He hadn‟t even finished asking the question when she began shaking

her head. “Too many memories. Too many other people who might let the

wrong things happen under its roof. I‟ll turn over management to Sadie, if

she wants the job. But I‟m moving forward in life, hoping that the restaurant

allows me a fresh start.”

It would. Luc would see to that. He had the talent, connections, and

influence.

He kissed her forehead. “Close your eyes.”

She shook her head. “Not yet. Since it seems to be the night for truth,

why don‟t you tell me your secret?”

250

Shayla Black