3

3 Nzinga was a teetotal, vegan, non-smoking, radical feminist separatist lesbian housebuilder, living and working on wimmin's land all over America before moving on, a gypsy housebuilder Dominique was a drinking, drug-dabbling, chain-smoking lesbian feminist carnivorous clubber who produced theatre by women and lived in a London flat she soon became a teetotal, vegan, non-smoking, radical feminist lesbian housebuilder on wimmin's land called Spirit Moon, which only allowed lesbians to reside there other females could visit, adult males and boys over ten could not their job was to help build affordable houses in order to tempt younger women to revitalize an ageing community the rural setting of Spirit Moon with its endless space and vistas was invigorating to Dominique compared to the polluted air, dirty streets, frenzied atmosphere and hard-edges of London where life happened at such a fast pace she'd been swept up into its masculine (as Nzinga pointed out) metropolitan maelstrom ever since first arriving from Bristol

the two of them were allocated a log cabin at the furthest reaches of the estate, an idyllically isolated corner where they could snuggle away from the world and toast crumpets over an open hearth in front of them were fields, behind was a beech, birch and maple forest that first night Dominique was too excited to sleep, she went to sit on the veranda in the darkness listening to the unfamiliar sounds of the countryside how could Amma have wanted to deny her this experience? was it jealousy, as Nzinga suspected, saying that as she'd usurped Amma as the most important person in Dominique's life, Amma couldn't handle it? it was true that she and Amma had been soulmates without the sex and now Nzinga was her soulmate, a total, one-off goddess, why couldn't Amma see that? and her rudeness at the dinner was unforgivable, how could she have twisted Nzinga's words when she was only trying to help everyone understand how racism worked? Nzinga was a good person with a big heart who'd landed in Dominique's life when she was in between lovers and ready for something different and just as she was tiring of running a theatre company where she spent too much time on the conveyor belt of writing grant applications with a measly 10% return Amma hadn't really taken on board her complaints about this, had always reminded her what a great team they were, Dom, look at what we've achieved yes, but deep down Dominique had wanted something new, an adventure, even though she hadn't articulated it and didn't know what form it would take long summers on Lesbos where she camped on the beach with hundreds of other lesbians were no longer quite so enchanting after seven consecutive years European city breaks were okay but hardly fulfilling, she'd been to Guyana a couple of times and knew she couldn't really live there easily as an out lesbian, and she wasn't interested in teaching English as a second language somewhere abroad, a popular option with other twenty- somethings and then Planet Venus beamed Nzinga down to her at Victoria station to give her the Great Love that Changes Everything

that first week at Spirit Moon they were invited to a buffet at the house of Gaia, who owned the estate and bequeathed it to the trustees in her will, to ensure it remained wimmin's land in perpetuity her home was a sprawling ranch house with vaulted ceilings, patchwork throws, curvilinear sculptures of female bodies, pottery vases, bucolic paintings and tapestry wall hangings Gaia had made herself there were no images of any men anywhere they poured outside to enjoy the warm night, the lawn lit by flaming torches staked into the ground the clear soprano of Joan Baez, mournful alto of Joni Mitchell, and the richer, melodious contraltos of Joan Armatrading and Tracy Chapman emanated from the deck of the record player on the veranda Dominique heard crickets, the distant sounds of owls, the hum of women enjoying each other's company, she was fascinated and felt like a time- traveller who'd voyaged into a quite magical alternate society the women's faces were tanned, healthy, seemingly untroubled, as if they were at ease with themselves and each other all this happy-happiness felt weird to Dominique as she moved among this group of strangers who greeted her with genuine enthusiasm was this a cult? she was used to cool Londoners who checked you out with a critical eye before deciding if you were worthy of their time and conversation Gaia's grey hair was whipped up into a bun, others wore plaits or crew cuts, a couple of the black women favoured the simplicity of cornrows they wore jeans and slacks, tee-shirts and baggy shirts, gilets or waistcoats, jumpsuits and baggy dresses, nobody wore make-up or high heels they brewed their own beer, had a vineyard, a few smoked cigarettes and marijuana, Dominique longed for a relaxing draw, but she'd promised Nzinga she was done with it, agreeing that a poisoned body was a sign of a poisoned mind the women who lived in the community came from every profession, as well as former housewives, they were craftswomen, chefs, teachers, farmers, shopkeepers, musicians, many were retired

Dominique was curious to know more Gaia told her she'd been through the wars for social and legislative acceptance in the fifties and sixties, eventually deciding to turn her back on men, she was done with the patriarchy when she inherited her parents' Long Island mansion, she bought this farm did she miss men? never, the women of Spirit Moon try to live in harmony, even when arguments break out, we have a talking circle and try to sort it out, women can also choose to live hundreds of acres apart until things cool down, a feud might take years to heal, in time there's forgiveness, even if scars remain occasionally a resident is forced to leave over unsanctionable behaviour such as violence or theft, if a woman goes straight and wants relationships with men, she has to leave, if she's celibate, she can stay, once we had a woman who turned and was caught sneaking men on to the property at night she had to go Dominique said the women seemed very laid back, not the ball-breakers of her imagination, although there was nothing wrong with ball-breakers, she'd even been accused of it herself there's no need to be breaking balls here, Dominique (what a pretty name you have), because there are no men here, which is why we come across as serene to you, we can just be ourselves, reclaiming the Feminine Divine, connecting to and protecting Mother Earth, sharing our resources, making decisions communally but maintaining our privacy and autonomy, self- healing the female body and psyche with yoga, martial arts, walking, running, meditation, spiritual practice whatever works for each one of us Dominique chatted freely, moving at ease between the women, as fascinated with them as they were with her, a black British woman, a rarity in these parts, they commented, visibly appraising her favourably she was used to that, and enjoyed it Nzinga stayed in her seat on the veranda all night, grim-faced, people approached her warily as a result, whenever Dominique looked over, she noticed Nzinga monitoring her every movement, although it didn't stop her

mingling, enjoying a conversation with a stunning Native American woman called Esther, who wore a figure-hugging jumpsuit, who taught Ashtanga yoga to women in town, who hoped Dominique would come to her sixty- fifth birthday party I'd love to, Dominique replied, complimenting Esther on looking so great for her age, just as Nzinga unexpectedly tapped her on the shoulder we have to go really? they walked back to their house in the dark on paths that cut through the fields either side of them, Nzinga beamed the torch ahead, Dominique felt happily removed from her customary life in London in this quite special place, was she going to go all hippy-dippy, too? Nzinga was quiet for a while, then declared it's better if we don't socialize any more, once is enough, I'm here to be with you, not them, and I can only take so much of the fake friendship of white women and their flunkies, if they invite you to their talking circle say no, it's a ruse to find out your private business and use it against you at a later date remember we're here to work, it'll only mess things up if we blur the boundaries, and trust me, don't believe all that Mother Earth bullshit, I've been around enough of these women's communities to know these witches are as malevolent as any other person out there why are we here if you're so critical of them? Dominique asked because I don't want to live in a man's world they continued talking and walking, feet crunching on stony ground with me, you're safe, Nzinga said, although Dominique wasn't feeling particularly unsafe with me, you're complete, although Dominique wasn't feeling incomplete with me, you're home, because home is a person and not a place Nzinga said she'd been thinking about renaming Dominique as Sojourner, a feminist re-baptism, after Sojourner Truth, the anti-slavery activist, proceeding to deliver a potted history, although Dominique knew exactly who the legendary abolitionist was, as every self-respecting black feminist did, and said so she still got the lecture

it will be a feminist awakening of your new self, Nzinga explained, having a name more appropriate than a feminized Dominic I like my name so keep it, I'll call you Sojourner anyway, daaarlin' Dominique decided Nzinga could call her what she liked, she wasn't going to answer to bloody Sojourner or any other name, Nzinga was showing signs of being a bit odd, perhaps Amma was right when she'd warned her, don't go to America with that woman, Dom, you'll regret it the veranda light of their log cabin emerged out of the darkness, Nzinga said the dark wasn't something to be feared when staying on land occupied only by women Dominique thought rapists and serial killers didn't need to be brain surgeons to surmount a high fence to get to their prey they lit candles in the bedroom, made love, Nzinga said it was how they shared their deepest connection, Dominique agreed to that, sex with Nzinga was a wholly enjoyable experience in that Nzinga mainly serviced her, which she discovered she liked, as opposed to the more egalitarian actualities of her sexual past, which now seemed unfulfilling, although not at the time as they lay awake afterwards in each other's arms, Dominique did feel complete, or at least more complete Nzinga stared up at the low beams of the timber ceiling and told Dominique she'd earned the right to hear more about her life, starting with Roz, her first partner, now it was clear they were going to spend the rest of their lives together Dominique thought that was premature a lifetime was a vast distance into the unknowable future when you're still only in your twenties it's early days yet, Nzinga she wanted to say it was on wimmin's land in Oregon where Nzinga met Roz who she thought was the love of her life, an older white woman who showed her that women were much happier without men

Roz was a builder of everything from garden sheds to tree houses to cabins to large houses and barns, Nzinga was apprenticed to her for the first few years she felt cherished, blessed it was a pretty idyllic existence working together during the day, loving together at night, until she discovered Roz was a lapsed alcoholic who kept it secret, it came out when Nzinga found Roz's secret stash of gin which she was working her way through while Nzinga slept after the first confrontation, nothing Nzinga could do was right they fought, first verbally, then physically, ornaments were smashed, furniture upturned, curtains ripped off, window panes cracked, one night Roz was rushed to hospital, a broken bone, minor head contusions, nothing major, nothing life-threatening the (all white, of course) women's community blamed Nzinga, said they'd had enough and it was time for her to go, which was deeply unfair she was callously evicted, packed her belongings into a single rucksack, was escorted to the gates and ejected into the outside world it took her years to get over the injustice of it Nzinga hit the road, hired herself out to women's communities on the Eastern seaboard, recovered emotionally, had a couple of relationships that ended badly when people revealed their true selves, decided to go searching for a true soul sister, which took years I had to travel all the way to London to find her you – Sojourner Nzinga turned to face Dominique, pillow to pillow, cupped her cheeks in her large, strong hands now that I've opened up to you, let's agree not to keep any secrets between us from now on, I want to know everything about you and you will know everything about me agree? Dominique nodded, aware, however, that turning her head from side to side was practically impossible because it was held in the iron clamp of Nzinga's hands, no longer just warm and romantic but mechanical do you still love me? more than ever, Dominique replied honestly, even more admiring of Nzinga for her honesty and strength in surmounting such trials she was grateful that such a woman had chosen her

or rather as Nzinga said, love chose them.